I Miss College Bars

First of all – if you haven’t read the Sept. 15th Strib article titled “Nightwatch: Guide to U of M nightlife” no worries…just read below.

I laughed my ass-off; as will you when you read this. (okay it’s really just meant for those who either went to the U or lived around there). His little guide seems to be a fairly accurate.

Tom Horgen, Star Tribune
Back to school means back to the bars for the roughly two-thirds of University of Minnesota students who are 21 or older. If you're approaching drinking age, it should be your first time -- hockey players excepted. Here's one thing all of you should know: There's more to college bars than just getting smashed. It's about getting smashed with your brethren. You know, finding your niche, where you belong. To help, I've devised a little guide to help you navigate your stumbling odyssey into the U of M's bar scene.
For frat boys
Oh, my, it's a three-way tie: Sally's, the Library and Blarney Pub come in neck-and-neck for the most polo- collar popping, Abercrombie & Fitch-loving, shoeless flip-flopping, camo-shorts-wearing frat boys. Boo-yah!
For music lovers
No doubt: The Dinkytowner is still doing its thing, especially with all the great underground hip-hop it's been featuring lately. Also peep the surging Nomad World Pub, which has reggae fests, jazz series and all sorts of other music, from indie rock to world beat.
For bringing sexy back
All sofas. All vintage. The Kitty Cat Klub is, um, comfy. Bring a date, lounge about, make out in the photo booth. Fall in love.
For maximum grime
If you're looking for a real dive -- like, where they drink beer for breakfast -- look no farther than Palmer's.
For beer lovers
If you really care about all that beer you're funneling down your throat, you might wanna check out the Town Hall Brewery. Its wide selection includes originals and brews from all over the world.
For THE GREAT outdoors
There's nothing like drinking in the fresh air. Both the outdoor patio at Sgt. Preston's and the deck at Grandma's Saloon are great. But hurry before the snow hits.
For a date
Check the calendar at the Varsity Theater, because this venue is wildly diverse, from rock concerts, to plays, to movies, to salsa dancing.
For punks
Where else but the Triple Rock?
For a Margarita
Wow, Burrito Loco's upstairs bar is a dump, but they make a mean margarita.
For those stranded on Como
Don't worry, these quasi-dives have you covered: Manning's, Sportsmans Pub and American Sports Cafe.
For smokers
You can't smoke at Stub and Herb's but you can wail all day long about the ban with owner and ex-gubernatorial candidate Sue Jeffers.

As much as I would love to disagree with Mr. Horgen I can’t. He’s pretty much got the majority of it figured out. Granted there isn’t much to figure out. While reading his comments I thought about my own memories of these bars (and some others because I also lived in St. Paul).

Here was my take on some of the St. Paul/Minneapolis Bars that are frequently visited by U of M students:

When I want:

Crappy/cheap long islands, to sing obnoxiously on stage and meet really random frat boys – Blarney’s.

To enjoy an hour of “Ladies Night” and a load of skipping music,spilt popcorn and satisfy my taste buds with a Coney dog – Bullwinkles

To drink REALLY CHEAP beer – Sportys

To hangout with ALL of the U of M College of Ag – Campus (All American Sports Café)

Good patio time and sharing moments (not to mention their cheese fries yum!) – Sgt. Prestons

To feel really sleazy – Grandmas

Popcorn crazy, sorority girl city and best bud bouncers – Sallys

2 fo 1's every night and the other half of the COAFES – Ol’ Mex

Retro/Piano Bar/Polk Dancing – Nyes

To meet a rich/preppy boy and super popped collar mode – Plums

To meet a lawyer or decent man who actually has a real salary and 401(k) – The Independent (added bonus – purse hooks)

To feel very important and fabulous – Bar Fly

To see my closet friends, feel at home and kick-back with some great cosmos and awesome wait staff (better known as my home in 2005) – Sterbs.
(Please note: This occurred between the dates of 2004 and Spring of 2006)

So many memories and so many options.