It's death because I appreicate fine foods such as these from far away places, but yet I need to hold back. As much as I love things growing (like my bank account or our GDP) I'm not a fan of a growing ass. So how do I rid of my temptations? Whenever I think of eating the food I instead bring it over to the President and force him to have something or I discretly pick out a piece and randomly throw it away. This way I don't eat anything but yet I rid of it faster. Clever yes, does it really work....eh.....sometimes. I do have some weak moments when my arm overtakes me and let's me take a bite. Horrible and disgusting, I know. I can't wait for the season to be done with.
12.28.2006
Watch it Grow
It's death because I appreicate fine foods such as these from far away places, but yet I need to hold back. As much as I love things growing (like my bank account or our GDP) I'm not a fan of a growing ass. So how do I rid of my temptations? Whenever I think of eating the food I instead bring it over to the President and force him to have something or I discretly pick out a piece and randomly throw it away. This way I don't eat anything but yet I rid of it faster. Clever yes, does it really work....eh.....sometimes. I do have some weak moments when my arm overtakes me and let's me take a bite. Horrible and disgusting, I know. I can't wait for the season to be done with.
12.26.2006
DC Sleeps Tonight
Anyway..Christmas is done. Yay. I'm happy for the holiday for the true meaning of it but like Charlie Brown I get sick of the 'commercialism' of it all. Although, unlike Charlie Brown I don't go out and get a scrappy tree, I instead decorated less, spent more time with those I actually like and did everything on the minimal level. It was nice, 'cept my minimalist view didn't coincide with my mom's. Now first of all....I have a kickass mom, but she is a little too much like Chevy Chase in the movie National Lampoons Christmas Vacation. She tries to do EVERYTHING and gets all mushy. Two things I can't deal with well. But I lived through it....thank God.
I am disappointed though in a few things during my trip back to the homeland. A) There was hardly ANY snow. I saw a few flakes which resulted in me shouting "Thank God for this!" after getting off of the plane (yes, I got a lot of strange looks). B) Forgetting half of my luggage (for some reason I pack better when I'm intoxicated) and C) My cell decided right at 11:59 pm on Thursday night to go to cellphone heaven. That resulted in me going and buying a new one which led to the following:
Scene: Walking into TM Store.....
Me: *gritting teeth* "I don't want to be here. I liked my cellphone,
it was good to me....most of the time."*Looking at cell accessories* "Whoever
buys these jewel things needs to be shot."(muttered under my breath)
TM Rep: "Can I help you? I understand you want some jewel
accessories."
Me: *ignoring the smartass* "Yes, I'd like a phone that let's me take calls and make calls."
TM Rep: *blank stare and stiffled laugh* "Ummmm...okay, we've got some
Razors you might like."
Me:"No. Everyone has a damn Razor."
TM Rep: "Well here's this one for a nice price. It has a MP3 player
and takes excellent video...let me show you." *shows video*
Me: "Turn that off. I'll buy it because you seem like a nice guy."
Ten minutes later, I have a new phone. Bad thing though is
that all my numbers couldn't change over to my new phone because either the
guy was stupid or there was that much wrong with the death of my old
phone. I'm going with the first one.
But in true holiday fashion I had more "happy" moments than bad ones...for example:
I got to spend a lot of time with cousins I haven't seen in ages. And when you get 7 20 somethings together for two days, lots of quality trouble can happen (though it will not make this blog). I also got to spend some time with my new nephew and two nieces, who hold some of the families best genes. I'm thinking, we've got us a future Gopher wrestler and two Olympic gymnasts. And one of the greatest moments was.........*drum roll*........I GOT A BOWLING BALL!!!!!!!!
Yes, it was an amazing moment. Of all the presents it is my most cherised one. I don't know why, but it is. It's a pretty pink marbled one with my name on it. It was so much fun to have it fitted just for me today and I'm sure the guy helping me thinks I have a crush on him. In all reality I was gazing at my new ball, not him. But I'll just let him dream (haha).
So yes, the great holiday moments of 2006 are done. I need to now make it through the next two long days of work before the 4 day weekend for the New Year. Let's hope I can make it seeing there is NO ONE left in DC right now. The city is dark and lonely and my phone is barely ringing (okay that's a lie, but when half of your friends are gone it's really dead and boring). Maybe this will give me some time to find a bowling league to join!
12.18.2006
I'm a Slug
I’m a lucky girl though because I have around a dozen awesome friends who have been tiredly trying to rid of my passion for bitchiness over the last week (I’m thinking there is now a special place in heaven for them). A few of them tried it by doing drinks…..you’d think I could cure it with alcohol but that was a negative…..it just made it worse. I’m so crabby that I can’t even fathom downing a nice cool gin and tonic.
Another friend tried it by planning our New Years. That started to soften the mood until I remembered that New Year’s is my least favorite holiday on earth. Seriously, it’s just another day that goes into a new calendar year. Woohooo……don’t forget to toot the horn and wear that crazy party hat!!!! *please note sarcasm* I’m sure you’ve guessed it….I don’t bother making any resolutions. I feel that you can do that at anytime/day of the year.
And let’s not forget the wonderful man who made me pecan pie. I’m sure he thought it would help….knowing that he even made it from scratch (note: the pecans were from his home back in AL). Not only did he make pie but offered it with a fine ale during a football game. In normal times I’d be in my glory, but instead I just sat there and booed life. Okay, I booed mostly things such as the organic market (long story), marriage and federal funding. But I’ll hand it to him; he booed right along with me.
You see, having this mood not only makes me feel crabby but like a bad person. I’ll soon be leaving for home over the holiday. Don’t get me wrong, I’m excited to go home but I’m afraid this crabby side is just gonna stay. And when you get me around family being all damn perky cause it’s the holidays I have this awesome ability to counteract it with my most wicked attitude you’ll ever witness.
I have not clue as to why I’m crabby. I’ve got some of the best friends on earth, a family who is there for me 24/7 and a job that keeps me secure. Not to mention, I have a social life better than that of college. So instead of finding a scapegoat with any relevance I’ll just chalk it up to the weather. I’m sick of people being jolly over the stupid 73 degree weather we have here. NO WHERE IN HELL do they show happy Christmas commercials where there ISN’T snow outside. But noooo…..we LOVE this warm weather. My gosh, we’re NOT in the south so please Mother Nature, do something about it (ahem, drop the temp about 50 degrees). So I’ve got happy peeps in DC and then crabby peeps in MN cause of the warm weather. And yeah, I hate them both. Not the people but the weather and what it’s doing to me. Winter is my best season and it has yet to arrive. Maybe I’m just getting anxious. Regardless……if I don’t get any cold weather I will go crazy. Sleeping with my window open and a fan on at night just like I did back in July just seems so wrong.
So, I’m just sitting here with a list of stuff to do but just too darn crabby to get my tush off the seat and do it. And of course, I’m upset about that. It’s official, I’m a slug who takes long showers, stares at the tv and wears a robe whenever possible. Okay, I’m only home about a few hours of the day to let that happen, but yet, I’ve mastered the ‘slug’ art during those few precious “me” hours.
Alrighty – I’m going to go now and take a nap before I got to bed.
12.14.2006
That's a Nice Drill You've Got There.
When I got back to the office I was a little light headed (thanks to all the drugs) so mentioning this to my co-worker seemed like a great idea…..of course she gave me the “are you crazy?” look and said something loud enough for our boss to hear. Of course that brought out his curiosity and he walked in and said “Who’s got nice hair?” I then proceed to tell him about my dentist. Explaining how difficult of a time I had trying to figure out whether he was married or not. Sadly I still don’t know. As soon as I went into detail on how I knew he had well toned abs my boss shook his head and said “Sometimes you give me a heart-attack.”
There is a reason for his comment….you see my boss is a ‘lucky’ man who works with three women who are the ages of 24, 25 and 34. One is married, the other has a long-term boyfriend and then there’s me…the single one. So of course everyone focuses on why I’m single and then figure out if there’s a way to fix that. We do talk about the each others relationships but yet, again, I really don’t have a real one so that is why they like to hone in on me. Of course I tend to shy away from it even though it can be funny at times, such as being set-up with a Canadian during the Stanley Cup. Or my boss trying to tell me where to go for a first date….explaining what the different prices of a meal would mean for payback. He was also kind enough to point out that a CVS was on the way home. If that didn’t turn me red, I don’t know what would have!
So naturally to get them off of my back I tell them of my odd crushes and the latest, of course, being my dentist. Yes, that is an odd crush to have. But I figured he’d be a good guy to marry for several reasons. A) We already know he’s gainfully employed. B) Free dental care (and I NEED that!) and C) If he doesn’t mind kissing me AFTER he’s seen what the inside of my mouth looks like, then he’s got to be a good man.
Sadly, I don’t think me strategy is working. Oh well…..there’s always the UPS guy.
12.11.2006
my boys
There’s a show now on TBS called my boys. Just by chance I came across it one night sitting around at home. Let’s just say, wow, it was like looking into a mirror. Not that I look a lot (or at all) like PJ, the main character, but there was a point where I felt as if that show was a total reflection of my life (in most parts). Here you have a girl who hangs out with these five guys. PJ, is basically one of THE guys. She loves baseball and puts sports first. (I'm the girl who cried because she missed her first home wrestling match for the Gophers in three years). She’s not over dressy and would rather spend a night with her buddies drinking beer and watching sports rather than going out for girly things.
I, like PJ, have five pretty close guy friends that I consistently hang-out with. We have our bar, Stub and Herbs (on My Boys it's Crowleys) where they know us all by name and our favorite drinks. We watch and argue over sports and almost all of us agree that baseball is a true religion. Relationships for all of us can be touch and go so more than not you’ll find us back at square one, or should I say, Sterbs. The poker part is the one thing we don’t have going for us….this is probably because none of us are really good at it (that I know of) and we would rather spend (waste) our money on other things…a.k.a beer.
Another commonality I have with PJ is the fact that the dating is difficult. I guess the new guy gets a little turned off when he discovers your five closest friends are of the male origin. Not to mention with my boys......they don't take to new people too well. Another problem with having all male friend is that you can easily forget to look for men when you are always with them.
One of the finer moments that I've had (like PJ) was whenever I would attempt to dress-up, the boys couldn't figure out why and they would make fun of me for doing so. This is probably the reason for my love for the ‘nice’ shirt, jeans and moccasins. For some reason, they find that hard to mock. (okay that was a lie, I have been called Pocahontas by them).
Unfortunately ‘my boys’ are all (‘cept for one) back in the Midwest and I’m in DC. I miss them all terribly. But I have found that they are truly my boys because no matter how little or how much I see them, they still love me….okay, they have weird ways of showing it; such as telling me that I smell (I even got a phone call one time claiming that the Governor of Colorado agreed I smelled), rolling their eyes and sighing when I start buying cosmos and consistently hitting my arm until it bruises. The list could go on forever! But I also know that they really care because they’ve allowed me on guy trips and have been there for me in some of my worst and best times (that list can go on too but who needs to hear the mushy stuff?!).
Yep. Those are My Boys and I wouldn’t trade them for the world.
12.09.2006
My Life Soundtrack!
So here's what it is............
Opening Credits: I’m Through – Vic Chestnutt
Waking Up: Never Saw Blue Like That – Shawn Colvin
First Day At School: Her, You and I – The Changes
Falling In Love: You’re Still the One - Orleans
Shower Scene: Cheer for Me – 95 South
Fight Song: Let’s Stay Together – Al Green
Breaking Up: Back Where I Belong – Alison Moyet
Prom: Just Between You and Me – April Wine
Life's OK: See Ya – Atomic Kitten
Mental Breakdown: Deeper – Attica Blues
Driving: Mickey – B*Witched
Sex Scene: When I See You Smile – Bad English
Flashback: Can’t Get Enough of Your Love – Barry White
Getting Back Together: Taxman – The Beatles
Wedding: Eleanor Rigby – The Beatles
Birth of Child: In the Blood – Better Than Ezra
Final Battle: Drive – Bic Runga
Funeral Song: As If – Blaque ft. Joey Fatone, Jr.
End Credits: Winding – Bonnie Somerville
12.06.2006
An Etiquette I'll Never Understand
You see, there's a certain type of etitquette for everywhere you go. Now when I say etiquette, I'm not talking place settings and when you're suppose to serve to the left or right. I'm talking about what is normally expected of you because you live/work in that area. I caught on pretty fast but it wasn't until today when I realized how crazy some of it is. So here is my list of etiquette 'rules' that I've discovered since moving here.
If you are a career person, not married and live/work in DC you need to follow the following:
1. ALWAYS have a business card on you. Business IS pleasure here.
2. Always stand on the right side of the escalator in the Metro stations.
3. When approaching the opposite sex walking a dog - stop, smile, pet and flirt.
4. Attending at least one happy hour a week is required.
5. Within the first five minutes of meeting someone you must discuss politics and religion.
6. Checking your Blackberry and taking phone calls during dinner is appropriate.
7. When giving directions to people you must always include the closest metro stop.
8. Shake hands first time, hug second time, kiss on cheek and hug from then on (for greeting a friend).
9. A half smile and nod is the equivalent of full eye contact and a hug in MN....so watch it.
10. Be close to your friends and closer to your enemies (i.e. invite EVERYONE to your functions....word gets around if they aren't on the list).
11. Girl - allow the men to buy you drinks, they are offended if you don't.
12. Everyone should own a black winter coat - color is too risky.
13. Boy - always make sure the girl gets home safetly.
14. Business casual is the new t-shirt and jeans.
15. Going to political socials is more important than going to sporting events.
Now, if you know me, you'd know that I disagree with most of these. For instance, I said no to a political event and a happy hour tonight because the Gophers were wrestling Okie Sate. Even though I can't watch it on TV I will sit myself infront of the computer for live updates the entire night. (I'm doing that right now!.....we're currently ahead...*nervous, very nervous*). To me, very few things come before my Golden Gopher Wrestling team and I wasn't about to start letting my guard down.
But then again, I agree with some of the etiquette such as boys watching out for the girl or the escalator thing. Yet, I do miss the days when I can sit at home, wear crappy clothes, crack open a beer and yell at hockey on the TV. Until then...who's up for cocktails in Georgetown?
11.28.2006
I asked for a bowling ball....
anyway, as for x.mas. i'm excited cause it will be my first grown-up one where i rock the work parties along with all the other ones. also, it will be my first White House Christmas party shin-dig too. i'm nervous for that one cause i'm forseeing me looking and acting like a fool. we'll just have to wait a week and see. no worries, there will probably be a post on that.
as for my title.....yeah, i asked for a bowling ball for x.mas. not because i'm great at bowling (well, yes i am when it comes to playing it via the Wii) but in all reality i think it would be 'nifty' to have my own bowling ball with my name on it. then maybe i'll go bowling more than the average 2x a year that i currently do.
when i brought the idea up to my mom, she said "what? why? you rarely bowl." i counter-acted her by mentioning that she had only gone kyaking only once befrore she bought her own kyak. funny how that quieted her down and then came with me to check out bowling balls. i think i might luck out and actually get one. again, i'll let you know if i do.
so yeah, i asked for a bolwing ball for Christmas.
11.15.2006
I love you Frank.....
Anyway, this Saturday just proved to me how crazy it is. In a matter of 24 hours I hungout w/ the Fed Society, celebrated a birthday, watched Big Ten football, talked to 5 friends on the phone, did the West Wing, saw Harriet Miers, semi-helped a friend move, went to dinner and watched a cab hit a parked car, met up w/ co-workers for another birthday party, and then took a drive w/ a friend who I ran into on the street at 2:30 am.
Phew. I'm exhausted just recalling that. I am happy to say that also during that time I was hit on by 8 guys and got made fun of and/or hung-up on by 2 friends.
Here were my top picks from the 24 hr period:
Best pick-up line: "You....now I'm no expert....but you...you have GORGEOUS hair"
Most Hilarious Moment: "Your name is Aweswome" *then he fell off the stool*
Worst Moment: 45 mins to find parking by Dupont
Most Bizarre Moment: Running into PP at 2 am and then having an agrument
Can't Believe I Went There Moment: Flirted w/ a 1 L from Michigan
11.13.2006
Shopping.....*argh*
**WARNING - GIRLY POST!!!!**
This past weekend was a nice three day one which amounted to me succeeding at two things – cleaning my apt (to the bare bones) and finding a dress for an upcoming wedding. The cleaning was awesome – I was done in 4.5 hours. I literally got to a point where I ran out of stuff to clean. The freezer and linen closets were even clean!
Now dress shopping was a little different. I am a girl – yes. That is very clear, but when it comes to shopping, I’m very much like a man. I walk in, get what I want and leave. Very little time is spent ‘browsing.’ My mother is a window-shopper. I don’t get it. You either like it and buy it; or you don’t. Simple.
But when it comes to clothing, okay more like dresses (for semi to formal occasions)….it does take me a long time. As in, I will probably try on more than 5 dresses. The there are two reasons for this, you need to look “good” in a dress because nothing is worse than spending a boat load of $$ on something that isn’t flattering for an event in which people do care about what you are wearing. Also, a dress is usually for a function where you will possibly meet someone of the opposite sex or should impress the hell out of your date. If he doesn’t think you look good in a dress…then it’s tough luck for you (i.e. the procession is usually from sweats, to jeans, to business casual, to formal) so basically you’re screwed if you can’t pull off the formal look.
It’s hard to believe but it took me a solid 25 dresses and 1.5 hours to find the right dress. I like the dress and got approval from two friends. I haven’t pre-tried it on man yet, but will before the function. (Man approval on 11/15/06). The I want to make sure that it’s worth keeping. I think I could’ve done better but that would have meant me going to another store and trying on more……something that that definitely wasn’t allowed in my allotted shopping time (I time EVERTHING I do in life down to the half hour).
After experiencing those few hours of hell I took care of it w/ a bottle of champagne and then a succession of bars in Dupont and a trip to Alexandria. I woke up the next morning feeling not so faublous but then I discovered (ahem, remembered) that I had a new dress.....so I tried it on, and all was good.
And in case if you were wondering about my accessories - the martini glass is JUST FINE.
11.11.2006
Whatever you say.
I was deployed back to my home state to work the GOTV-72 hr. I was thrilled because I still care about home. That is, until they switched my assignment. Less than 24 hours of boarding the plane I found out that I was be deployed to a small town 2.5 hours north of the Cities with 3 other woman. There were many things wrong with this situation. A) I was going NORTH of the Cities....that means closer to Unionville or the uber-conservatives....both of which I'm not. B) No friend of mine lives there. C) They are sending me there with all women....I can barely live with one how will I live 5 days straight w/ three strange ones? And we know they aren't normal becuase they are like me and were crazy enough to take time off work to make phone calls and knock on doors for a mid-term election in a strange state.
After finding out my bad luck I immediately got on the phone and tried to change it. No luck there. So I complained enough to get one of my guy friends to haul his ass up to the northland to help out and keep me mildly sane. We did our volunteer stuff, went crazy and had politics oozing out of our systems by the time Tuesday rolled around.
Our groups phone-banked a solid 7,200 calls and knocked over 500 doors (rough est)
It was a good time and had many nut-case moments including some of the following:
Argument over who has a better college:
AE (from Tennessee) - "Yadeeyada....we're awesome at something that I don't remember her saying"
Me (U of M) - "yeah, well we have science."
*I won*
"Keep up the chipper."
- Man on the phone after hearing my reminder to vote for the GOP
"Go, just go!!!"
- Meg (from Philly) after dropping lit at a house that just bagged a buck and was hanging it in their garage
*dry tone of voice* "He, he. His ego is amazing."
-About Newt Gingerich on FoxNews
"I've never heard someone fake a personality as well as you."
- JR in regards to my VERY chipper phone-banking voice
6 am Wednesday morning......*ring, ring*
Me: "Hey Tyler."
Tyler:"LET'S DRINK BEER!!!!"
Me: "I'm at the airport. Sorry."
Tyler: "You suck"
*click*
****More to come******
11.02.2006
In the Bubble
Inside the DC Bubble
By: Steve Kopperud
We in Washington, DC, live in a bubble. We spend a whole lot of time insulated from the real world between Washington and Los Angeles, talking to ourselves, listening to our DC-based pundits, reading our DC-tainted media, and we are always astounded when we get out of Washington that folks "out there" don't think the way we do or care about the things we've convinced ourselves are so important.
I've been on the road this week, spending time with folks who come primarily from midwestern states, and when I listen to them opine on their local or state elections or on the issues that matter to them, the words I hear just don't jive with what I hear in DC.
No partisan position taken here, but this "groundswell" to toss the GOP onto the streets that's become the drumbeat for East Coast and West Coast media isn't resonating with the folks with whom I'm talking. Is there frustration with Washington? You bet. Is there concern about the war in Iraq? No question. Is there a desire to elect a whole lot of new folks? Not so much.
What I hear people talking about is the economy, the explosion of biobased alternative fuels and what that means to crop production and marketing, security -- both financial and physical, and generally their personal quality of life issues.
The people with whom I've been spending most of this week want to see Washington get off the partisan bandwagon and refocus themselves. They blame the Democrats as much as the GOP -- as they should -- for the stalemnate in DC. But there's very much a "better-the-devil-you-know" mindset among these folks.
Is this the best of all possible worlds, politically? No, it's not. Would it better if we could point to victories and we could say, "They're doing their jobs." Yup, it would. But the folks out here in the Heartland are a smart bunch, and they understand the game. They just don't like how the game's being played in DC right now.
Leaders and rank and file of both parties need to wake up. They need to get off the national party bandwagon and get back to paying attention to the folks who will ulimately elect -- or unelect -- them in about two weeks.
I couldn't have said it better myself.
Five More Days!
Screw not being political.....
GIS DROP SMART BOMB ON KERRY
HILARIOUS HEROES FIRE BACK OVER DEM AND DUMBER CRACK ABOUT IRAQ
By TODD VENEZIA in N.Y. and IAN BISHOP in Washington
WACKY IN KHAKI:
A group of sharp-witted soldiers gives Massachusetts Sen. John Kerry a Memorable rebuke for his so-called "joke" advice to students to study or else end up "stuck in Iraq." The devastating photo raced around the Internet yesterday after being posted ona Milwaukee talk-radio host's blog.
NOVEMBER 2, 2006 -- WASHINGTON - A group of GIs showed they are smart enough to take on condescending Sen. John Kerry - by deploying a hilariously misspelled sign mocking the failed presidential candidate's comments about their education.
"Halp us Jon Carry - We R stuck hear n Irak," read the sign, which was apparently the brainchild of a group of service members from the Minnesota National Guard.
The picture was first revealed yesterday on the blog Web site of Milwaukee talk radio host Charlie Sykes, who said he got it from a listener who had a buddy in the unit.
The picture soon raced around the Internet, and it got much of the nation chuckling when it went up on Drudge Report later in the day.
Staff Sgt. Erik Holtan, a member of the Minnesota National Guard, says he saw the picture and recognized the insignia as that of his fellow Minnesota guardsmen - and he immediately put it up on his own blog site.
"It's awesome," he told The Post. "The troops over there have to be livid because of what [Kerry] said. I don't know why he would say that."
Holtan, who works at Guard headquarters, said he believes the troops behind the Kerry sign are in Iraq, since all the members of the unit in the shot - the 1/34 Brigade Troops Battalion - have been deployed.
He said he can see a unit insignia on one of the vehicles in the background and those vehicles have also gone to Iraq.
Fox News Channel quoted Army officials saying that the picture looked authentic and appeared to be taken in Iraq.
"We are always amazed at the creativity of our troops," one Army official told Fox.
Without citing sources, ABC News in Washington said the photograph was taken in Talil, several hundred miles south of Baghdad, where members of the unit are located.
By the end of the day, the shot was burning up the Internet - and was the most stinging rebuke to Kerry's knuckleheaded flub.
The Minnesota Guard and the Pentagon said they could not comment on the picture.
Meanwhile, Kerry surrendered yesterday to a barrage of criticism from Republicans and Democrats over his troop-trashing gaffe and apologized "to any service member, family member, or American who was offended.
Kerry's belated mea culpa, issued at 4:24 p.m., came after Democratic candidates in Iowa, Minnesota and Pennsylvania refused to campaign with him - and Republicans made him the centerpiece of their stump speeches.
"As a combat veteran, I want to make it clear to anyone in uniform and to their loved ones: My poorly stated joke at a rally was not about, and never intended to refer to, any troop," Kerry said in the statement.
"I sincerely regret that my words were misinterpreted to wrongly imply anything negative about those in uniform, and I personally apologize to any service member, family member, or American who was offended," he added.
Republicans pounced on the miscue by the Democrats' 2004 presidential nominee and thrust the divisive Kerry onto center stage to fire up the party's conservative base.
"You remember John Kerry, the senator who voted for the $87 billion before he voted against it - the guy that was always lecturing us about nuances," Vice President Dick Cheney said to a Montana GOP rally in remarks prepared for delivery.
Added Cheney, "Of course, now Sen. Kerry says he was just making a joke, and he botched it up. I guess we didn't get the nuance. He was for the joke before he was against it" - a reprise of the flip-flopper stigma Republicans tied to Kerry in 2004.
The war of words comes as Republicans and Democrats scramble for the upper hand less than a week before the crucial congressional elections.
Democrats need to pick up 15 seats in the House and six in the Senate to win back control.
Before issuing the statement, Kerry insisted he meant no offense to the troops and was trying to insult President Bush and his Cabinet for failing to do their homework before invading Iraq when he told students in California they'd "get stuck in Iraq" if they didn't study hard.
After the initial criticism Tuesday, Kerry had defiantly defended his remarks, saying he "apologized to no one" and ripping he Bush White House.
Kerry told nationally syndicated radio host Don Imus yesterday morning that he was only "sorry about a botched joke. You think I love botched jokes? I mean, you know, it's pretty stupid."
Imus, echoing may Democratic strategists, begged him: "Please stop it. Stop talking. Go home, get on the bike, go windsurfing, anything. Stop it. You're going to ruin this."
Montana Democratic Senate candidate Jon Tester concurred: "Sen. Kerry's remarks were poorly worded and just plain stupid. He owes our troops and their families an apology."
Before going to ground and issuing his apology on the Internet, Kerry, a Vietnam vet, accused the White House of trying to "distort something completely out of its context" for political gain.
White House press secretary Tony Snow shot back: "Kerry's words were pretty straightforward, and if you listen to the tone of voice in which he said them, it's hard to construe them as a joke. He didn't sound like he was trying to make funnies."
"Do the following words malign the troops? 'You know, education, if you make the most of it, you study hard, you do your homework, and you make the effort to be smart, you can do well, and if you don't, you get stuck in Iraq,'" Snow added.
"Those are the words. That's not the intention. We're sitting here trying to do mind-reading. We're not playing the 'what if' game. Do those words insult the troops? Apparently, troops believe so," he said.
The Republican National Committee cut a Web ad - e-mailed to supporters - that features a video clip of Kerry's original comment.
"John Kerry should apologize. Our soldiers are waiting," the closing caption says.
President Bush, appearing on Rush Limbaugh's national radio show, said, "Anybody who is in a position to serve this country ought to have the consequences of words, and our troops deserve the full support of people in government."
"We've got incredible people in our military, and they deserve full praise and full support."
********
Only in MN....
After a reporter for the Rochester (Minn.) Post-Bulletin noticed similarities in expression between mayoral candidate Pat Carr and an pseudonymous supporter who posted message after message of praise of Carr on the newspaper's website, Carr admitted that he was the "supporter." Said Carr, "I stand by what I" wrote.
******
No Wait, Only in WV.....
West Virginia State Sen. Randy White decided in October to remain in the race for reelection despite the surfacing of photographs taken two years earlier of White nude except for body paint in a group of similarly decorated men. White said he had had a "personal identification situation."
DON'T FORGET TO VOTE - NOVEMBER 7TH!
10.31.2006
SEC + Big 10 = Awesome
I literally became friends with SLS during one of those, a friend of a friend of a friend things. We met a week ago through a friend at an outing on the hill. It had been a rough week for the both of us and we found solace in each others stories and love for football (we did our college picks after 10 mins of knowing each other). On the outside we seem extremely opposite – she is a tall blonde from Georgia who loves the SEC. Whereas, I’m the stocky girl with brownish curly frizz who is as open and crass as they can get in the Midwest….not to mention I speak of the Big 10 as if it’s my religion. Even though we are so opposite on the outside, we have a million commonalities. I am working on a southern charm….she’s attempting to be more ‘real’ like the Midwest. Funny how we both like each others demographics yet neither have visited each others homeland.
Now, I was nervous when I had invited her over to bake and watch football with me. I didn’t know how she’d take it. Most of the girls I’ve met here are more into being either very domestic or very wild. Rarely do I find the combo. Also, they have a hard time making themselves at home….something that I loathe. But SLS proved all of that wrong in mere seconds of walking in my door. I told her the agenda and she said she was game – YES! Then I said, would you like to order some food – she said, pizza would be good – YES! I realized I didn’t have anything besides water and milk to drink…. “What would you like to drink?” I ask. “Ummm….I see you have tequila.” – YES! We then proceed to bake our coffee cake, order a pizza and run to the liquor store to buy more tequila. Once back we settle down, watch a little FoxNews as our pre-game, then turned on the MNF and drank our margaritas. I said my home team (Vikings) was playing. She said, “Good, I’ll cheer for them.” – Didn’t I tell you she was awesome?!
After the first quarter she said – “Now what about those caramel apples?!” So we headed to the kitchen. Now this is the fun part. We weren’t just making regular old joe caramel apples….we were making Rocky Road Caramel apples. A few more steps, that made the kitchen into a disaster zone. You see, once you roll the apple in the caramel…you then roll it on a plate that has crushed nuts and mini-marshmallows on it. After that you drizzle chocolate on them. The caramel-ling them was easy…….but when you have two tipsy girls attempting this, you might end up burning your hands (HOT CARAMEL) and getting your hair full of sticky stuff (note: pull your hair back before doing this). But we managed to get all 6 (yes, pathetic little six) done….after 25 mins. The laughing kept us from doing it efficiently. Not to mention I took 10 breaks to sweep the 3x6 ft floor because the nuts were flying everywhere (note: pounding the apple on the nuts doesn’t make them stick any easier).
As a result – we made some kick-ass caramel apples which were very heavy and filled you up after 2 bites. Also, the apple coffee cake was a hit at work (we might have an Iron Chef USDEC sometime soon!). Only bad thing – the Vikes lost…..it was pathetic.
10.30.2006
Meme - Yes, I'm pathetic!
1. Flip to page 18, paragraph 4 - in the book closest to you right now, what does it say?“Hereditary monarchy, like hereditary nobility, was already a medieval innovation. It is true that some barbarian lieutenants had held office by descent rather than deed. But the chieftains had been chosen for merit, and early kings wore crowns only advitan aut cuplam – for life or until removed for fault. " – A World Lit only by Fire by Manchester
2. If you stretch out your left arm as far as possible, what are you touching?
The 2005 dairy facts book; the Bible for any statistics on domestic dairy products.
3. What's the last program you watched on TV?
Fox and Friends at 6am today
4. Without looking, guess what time it is.
3:10 p.m. …..oohhh….I was close – it is 3:12 p.m.
5. Except the computer, what can you hear right now?
The hum of the printer; it’s really annoying when it runs.
6. When was the last time you were outside and what did you do?
I walked to Harry’s Tap Room for lunch.
7. What are you wearing?
Turtle neck sweater, skirt and flats (a bit of a ‘60’s collegiate look)
8. Did you dream last night? If you did, what about?
Umm…..I dreamt that I was married, well into a career and had 2 kids.
9. When was the last time you laughed?
Really hard? Last night when I watched the movie The Lion in Winter – too many one-liners that just killed me.
10. What's on the walls, in the room you're in right now?
Dairy propaganda.
11. Have you seen anything strange lately?
Not really. Yesterday I felt like I lived downtown NYC with all of the people in the street and the live bands playing literally 200 ft from my bedroom window. It was weird.
And I hungout with a really pregnant woman today....I'm not used to seeing that either.
12. What do you think about this meme?
Eh…kinda lame.
13. What's the last film you saw?
Film? The last movie was My Louisiana Sky, too family-esque by the way.
14. If you became a multimillionaire, what would you do with the money?
Pay off my debt and the family farms debt. Buy some land in the U.S. and abroad. Give to the MS Society and some others. Then throw a huge-ass party. And then invest the rest in mutual funds.
15. Tell us something about yourself that most people don't know.
I voted “No” for #1.
16. If you could change ONE THING in this world, without regarding politics or bad guilt, what would it be?
No obesity and no famine (they are one in my eyes)
17. Do you like dancing?
Yes! I need a good partner though.
18. George Bush?
Is a cutie. Shut-up!
19. What do you want your children's names to be, girl/boy?
Boys: Tristan; Clayton; Toby; Taylor; Perry
Girls: Madeline; or whatever comes to me after I’m out of shock because it’s not a boy.
*the ‘other’ person will need to agree w/ me of course.
20. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Yes – if I’m married.
21. What do you want God to tell you, when you come to heaven?
You only disappointed me through the years 0f 2001-2008.
I Don't Think So!
Now it's your turn to try!
10.26.2006
私は日本人を読むことができない。
Frustrating!
***
Less than TWO weeks until ya vote. I'm nervous and almost hitting the point where I watch/read the news non-stop. My co-workers are more than likely sick of me talking about it and the buzz on the Hill is going insane. You can hardly breath when you're at the Top of the Hill....you turn one way and there's a group talking about Maryland then another and people are freaking over Sen. Talent. Not to mention the RNC has gulped up a number of my closest friends; I think I remember what they look like. Might have to look for a picture. It was only by chance that I ran into RO and we got a share a whole solid hour together for the first time in over two weeks (that is long by our standards).
I'm excited and nervous. It is weird though, because for every 10 GOP friends I have out here I only have 1 Dem friend. (It was 50/50 back home) I don't even get solid arguments anymore. It's just like a bunch of us are getting squimish and are starting to argue stats/polls/media amongst ourselves. Those are usually the worst arguments. There have been a number of times when I've needed to just walk away and find solace in something else (which was baseball, then college football, now it's Dallas). Yes, you know I've gone off the deep-end when I start devoting at least an hour a night to watching the show Dallas. The next step towards crazy is when I sit there and crochet while watching the show. I haven't gotten there - yet. That might be because I cannot find my crochet hooks and yarn.
Regardless of whether or not I start crocheting, I will be a nervous/crazy person until November 8th. I don't handle losing well - okay, at all. It's not my thang, hence why the Gophers are killing me and why I cannot watch the World Series.
I just have to say - Lord help me and all those who will be around me for the next two weeks.
10.23.2006
My Heart is Broken
It may seem crazy in with my family's response, but that is how we roll. There is no sport higher than wrestling in our lives (no worries, we root for football and hockey like crazy). But our Gopher Wrestling team comes first. These are guys that we have watched and cheered for since their redshirting days....and maybe even before (if they came from a MN or IA H.S.) So when one of the team members is down, we feel the pain.
The team is currently ranked No. 1 for the NCAA preseason rankings...even though Okie State has held the last four years as the Natioanl Champs. This is the year that the nation is looking at the U to once again pull a victory come March. The team has been building and is bringing back seven national qualifiers....not too shabby. But the hole from Mack will be felt and I'm not looking forward to it. But I have a feeling that the Gophers won't let this shake them. Unlike some other sports at the U, wrestling doesn't rely on one individual to get the job done.
So......Good Luck Guys!
****
Speaking of OTHER Gopher sports....
WAY TO GO U of M Football Team. I'm so happy you were able to pull it off against the Bison. It was a true nail biter.
*Sorry, sarcasm is so hard to show via internet*
10.20.2006
I Baked a Cake - Now Give Me a DAMN Gold Star
5-6 pm – Drink at 4 Courts
6:30-10 pm – Drink at Pour House and Top of the Hill
10ish pm– Walk to metro
10ish later pm – Walk back to bar
10ish-11 pm – Stare at other people drinking
11 pm – Eat Taco Bell
12 am – Talk to roommate/shower/go to bed
4 am – Wake up
4:30 am – Still awake
5 am – Getting frustrated, buzz finally leaving, headache starting
5:30 am – Get out of bed and go bake a cake
6 am – Workout
7 am – Finish cake – get ready for work
8 am – Leave for work carrying cake
*******Tired blur and a lot of talking**********
1:30 pm – Go crazy with boss and co-workers…we had a mini bowling tournament
Lesson Learned:
Never promise to bake a cake (for co-worker birthday) then go to the bar where you know everyone. My ONE hour turned into five. I do know that during those five hours I announced to people that I was going to go home and bake a cake in heels becuase that is what good Republican women do.
I did it, but just not in the best condition - luckily the cake turned out to be a hit.
(The walking to metro and back was due to me forgetting to close my tab, so I had to go back, just don't tell AB I walked back from the bar seeing he was kind enough to make sure I got to the metro safe. No worries - RO drove me home, hence the late night Taco Bell run.)
10.18.2006
Science
Isn’t that cool!? Science!
Remember When We Had the Little Brown Jug?
Thank you, Glen Mason, for everything that you have given the U of M football team. I know you work so hard to give us the best there is.
Yeah right.
I’ve been a devoted Gopher fan since the day I’ve arrived on this earth (even during my two year stint at ISU). I’ve gone to games/matches, wore my maroon and gold and, yes, even traveled to crazy places to cheer on my Gophers. Rarely was I ever let down…..that is, with wrestling, basketball, hockey, track and volleyball. But I guess I can thank you for being the one coach that I can always count on – to lose. You have the ability to lose games that would seem impossible for a top Big Ten school. You lost to Purdue. Even Purdue Alumni (I have evidence) were amazed by that.
So you stink at coaching. That is okay, just admit it. I know it’s tough but the first step that you need to take is the ‘accepting that you really stink.’ You’re lucky that our Athletic Dept has nothing better to do than to renew your contract (one really sad note: even MY MOM thinks that is ridiculous and she’s not even a big Gopher Football fan).
Okay – I know that admitting something such as you stink at coaching after a solid 21 years of doing it can be tough. But please, for the love of all that is right in college sports, especially Big Ten, don’t turn the story around on the fans. Lord, your lucky you even have fans a the games. Hint: we come because we think college football is one of the greatest things out there….and we love our alma mater – not you. I understand that you were “upset” with some of the fans at the Penn State game because they booed at you. Ummmm….buddy, there will always be booing, as long as you’re coaching. I do know a way that you can stop it though. Be a better coach, or wait! No! Move on. Yes, that would be a better idea.
Also, please don’t go blaming the alcohol as the factor for the booing. I was there and I wasn’t drinking – BUT I WAS booing. At you. Oh my gosh! I’m sorry, was that rude of me? No. I paid to be there and I saw a crappy ending to what could’ve been a solid game. I believe I had the right to boo, just like I had the right to cheer (which I also did). And don’t worry – we’re not just complaining about you at the games, we spread our message whenever and wherever possible. I was at a restaurant several hours after our Penn State loss and heard a lady complaining about the lack of coaching you provide. Again, my apologies, but that’s what the consensus is. If you can’t accept it, that’s your tough luck.
Another thing – please don’t talk about how many bowl games we’ve been too. I’m not a college football expert, I’ll admit it, but I will admit we don’t deserve a bowl game with the type of schedule that you put together. I had to take five glances at this years schedule before I could even fathom the idea that we’re playing NDSU. NDSU!? Come on! My old AA MSHL football team could beat them. That is so sad. (I believe I just shed a tear over that.)
My point is, Mr. Mason, we don’t like your coaching. We’re fans of the game, but not fans of you. You put together stinky seasons and seem to not make the best use of the team you have and that makes us look bad. If we’re going to lose let’s lose to the best of them. It’s more embarrassing getting a bowl game (that seems made up…I’m banking on something like the Rice-A-Roni Bowl Game this year) out of a petty schedule than not getting a bowl game because we had a tough season.
So please, don’t go blaming the fans or the alcohol (which helps many of us make it through one of your games). Blame yourself for not listening to our pleas. We love our school and college sports and only want the best for them, but your not it.
In Gopher Spirit –
C.
2005 U of M Graduate
10.15.2006
Next time I'll have a taser.
I don't care who you are, what you vote and so on and so forth. No matter what, that was a very wrong thing to do. You don't see me going up to cars and ripping stuff off of them. I will laugh at those with their Kerry/Edwards stickers still on their cars but I don't do anything to them. (Side note: Seriously people, it's been two years, he lost, move on. At least my sticker was relavent).
I asked for some of the peoples advice on how to handle it and here is what I got -
1) Tear down a Webb sign (I have a feeling that won't accomplish much)
2) Get over it (option from mom)
4) Kick a Dem
I didn't like any of the suggestions....they were too lame and not very fun(Plus, I have a lot of Dem friends so that wouldn't be nice). Kicking someone seemed fun, but then I'm sure they would have kicked me back harder.
So I devised a plan. I've already got another sticker which I'll apply again to my car(hey - I've got another two years for this). Then I'll hide in the bushes waiting for the culprit. It'll probably be night and I'm guranteeing that it will happen after a night out on the town (i.e. bar). So I'll be waiting there in the bushes. So when the jerk comes to do it again, I'll jump out, yell "Don't mess with Texas!" and taser his/her sorry ass.
Ok....I won't be doing that.
But we can dream can't we?
Stupid "Compassionate Conservative" crap.
10.12.2006
Obsessions
I turned about five shades of red and asked for her not to ever mention that again. I don’t know if I was more embarrassed that she remembered that (of all things) or the fact that I STILL sing Patsy and she’s not the only person who remembers me for that. I guess some obsessions die hard. As I was recalling that (I’ve been obsessed with Patsy Cline music since I was around 10 years old) I have found that my obsessions today basically started at a young age and have yet to change. For instance, I’m still obsessed with Ronald Reagan (I chose to have my photo taken with his cutout instead of Michael Jackson when I was 9 because Ronnie was “So much cooler.”). Now I have a the Time commemorative issue of Ronald framed and hanging in my bedroom and a book of pictures of him during his Presidency.
Another obsession – wrestling. Not that fake crap but the Greco-Roman style done in college. My family has been going to Gopher wrestling since the beginning of time. It’s literally our one huge family thing we do. And to top that off, there is one wrestler in particular that I’ve been a little insane for. I watched him wrestle since we were both freshman in high school and then throughout his career with the Gophers. Even after a little ‘research’ when I found out that he doesn’t like to read and looked like he had the IQ of a 6th grader, I was still obsessed. I’m starting to let go of him but definitely not Gopher Wrestling. And yes, I hate posters, that is, unless it’s a poster of the Gopher Wrestling team which dawns my bedroom door.
My final obsession is agriculture; more specifically, dairy. It’s guaranteed that if you’ve known me longer than a minute, you probably know the industry from top to bottom and have discussed your daily consumption (3-A-Day of Dairy) with me. This is one obsession that I’ve attempted to kill a number of times to make myself look more ‘urbane’ but we all know that will never happen. I’m glad that is true seeing that was the lifestyle in which I was lucky to grow-up in. Yes, my brothers and I were a little odd because most of our time was spent working/playing on a farm and we were driving tractors and farm vehicles before we could see above the dashboard (I used a phone book as a booster). Or the fact that I read farm magazines from a young age (and still do now). And perhaps arguing with people about which breed/type of tractor/make of a truck is better. But beyond that, nothing too strange there *hehe*
Looking back, maybe I shouldn’t be so damn embarrassed of my obsessions. It shows that I’m fairly well-rounded (i.e. I like sports, politics, the arts and agriculture). I feel a little better. I think I’m going to throw on my Patsy now and get back to reading about the upcoming season for the wrestling team while listening to MSNBC.
10.10.2006
This One's for You Cus
As I had said, I’m tired of some of the political crap taking place out there so going to MN was a good excuse. It was much unexpected and a last minute decision based solely for pleasure. I had nothing in mind except to hangout and surprise the family. And that I was able to accomplish. I spent so much quality time with the family that I finally figured out why the hell I am the way I am.
We seem like a normal family at first glance but then you take a second look and then proceed to shaking of the head. Now I’m convinced that most families are just as odd but then there is that one moment when my family will outshine any other in the ‘eccentric’ round. This time was our October Birthday party. Since there are so many of us cousins (21 to be exact) we clump together the birthdays…..only one cousin gets to celebrate their b-day alone and of course that is me. But that is beside the point. Anyway, so I made it home for the October birthday party which in turn turned out to be more like an Oktoberfest for the family. It was freezing and 3 days away from MN’s first predicted snowfall….and it was to rain, but did we care? No. Instead we got extra blankets and booze to keep us warm as we all piled onto the wagon behind the old school Massey tractor for a family hayride. (We’re talking a wagon loaded down with over 45 people between the ages of 5-79).
My uncle driving the tractor was clad in old H.S. jacket, a hood and smoking a cigar like it was going out of style. He of course didn’t hear our yells as we kept getting whacked by tree limbs. There was a point when I thought we were going to lose the youngest to a small sapling, but my brother saved him just in time. To top it all off, it then started to rain heavily. Our only way of solving our dilemma was not by turning around and heading to shelter, no, it was by taking out the bottle of schnapps and declaring it was to be finished before getting back to the house (1.5 miles away). That was when the team effort kicked in. We’re a solid 50 feet from the house when we see that there was a few ounces left; I, of all people, suggest that Grandma should finish it off. I meant it kind of as a joke, but grandma didn’t hesitate. With our cheers she took one for the team. That was when I realized that I can now officially blame my genetics for the craziness that I exert.
This might explain why out of the all of the cousins that are 21 or older – ONLY ONE is married and has kids. (note: that family was not present for this day)
I don’t understand us. We’re above average students and none of us have ever gotten into trouble. But yet we seem to have a difficult time in graduating college in that little 4 year period. (I’m lying….only 5 of us seem to have had that problem) We also have a hard time settling down. The majority of us get into a serious relationship and then dump it soon after. It’s a fulltime job keeping up with who’s dating and who’s single. I just guess now. If a girlfriend/boyfriend shows up, we don’t latch on too fast because more than likely that person will not make it to the next shin-dig (which will take place only a few weeks later).
I’m actually happy that my entire family is like this. It makes me feel and look normal….we value success in jobs and schooling more than things like relationships and kids. Also, they don’t expect me to come to functions all prim and proper (okay sometimes we’re a snobby wine and cheese family but even then our problems start to shine through).
I love my cousins for all that they are, even with all of the stupid stuff that has gone down over the years. Surprisingly – we are all on a similar track and enjoy hanging out more now than we did when we were in diapers.
10.01.2006
I'm All Grown-up......Almost
Okay I may not be totally grown-up but I feel like I'm making progress. The the sign that I was maturing came when I realized that I had one of the most amazing weekends of my life and not one lick of alcohol touched my lips during it. Now don't get me wrong, I haven't stopped drinking; we all know that will be a cold day in hell when that happens. But I am slowly working away from things in the possible future such as my children knowing the differnce between a martini and a cosmo before knowing how to add 1 + 1. Or my husband explaining to the children why mommy is slurring the words during their bedtime story.
This past weekend I ended up putting in over 16 solid hours of volunteer work for the DC MS Challenge Walk. It was a 3 day walk covering 50 miles from northern VA up to the Capitol. I didn't walk it but the 350 people who did were amazing. I got to meet a huge variety of people that truly touched my heart. Majority of them are in the same boat as me, having someone close to them (for me, my father) who has multiple sclerosis. So not only was it a physically draining challenge but it was very emotional. I cried a few times. Mostly because I was amazed by the commitment that people have towards finding a cure for it, but also because it's finally starting to sink in that my father has MS.
That was another turning point for me on the maturity scale when I actually accepted the fact that my parents aren't getting any younger. It's been over a year now since we've discovered my father's condition. I had accepted it but I didn't take in all that was to come with the package. The first few months I didn't notice anything different, but then it was after I left and had longer periods of time in-between seeing him that I started to notice. He's getting a bit stiff...such as he can't walk very well. Also he gets tired very easily. So to see all of these supporters AND people WITH MS doing that 50 mile walk, I was over-joyed/amazed/emotional and everything in between.
The walk also allowed for me to meet a lot of fun people such as the couple from Michigan who bantered back and forth with me about who was gonna get the Little Brown Jug (they even came up to me and apolozied today). Or the lady who came all the way from MN for the walk...when I found out she loved the Twins I plowed her over with a hug. Let's not forget Doug who read my MN Hockey sweatshirt as MN Hickey....and proceeded to ask for one. And my last but not least - favorites were the GW MBA student volunteers. They were amazing help and made my weekend exiciting and entertaining beyond belief.
I thought I had the greatest weekend ever until....
I got home from my MS stuff and turned on the TV and found that my Twins were winning and ended up(after what seemed like enternity waiting for the Tigers to lose to KC) clinching the AL Central Division Title....I believe I got a little taste of what Heaven may be like.
(Okay this is just a 'taste of Heaven' cause my real Heaven must include a World Series, a real cure for MS and me being very, very well off with an adorable husband.... really, that's not asking for much!)
9.27.2006
Republican National Convention - 08 - MPLS/STPL BABY!
Besides getting to drink a lot of beverages, wearing a cute dress and make a load of ‘friends’ I also got to spend some quality time with George. Now George (a.ka. Loud Noises, Burrito, Smelly & Hey You) is the lovely, smelly, adorable & ear infected dog of my friend, Ryan. When I got to the house, the first thing I saw was George. He greeted me by plowing me over and rubbing his head on my leg. I haven’t been around animals in a long time so it was a nice change to get a little affection. George and I became tight during the weekend. After mourning the loss to Purdue and somewhat lubricated I asked if I could take George on a walk. Friend, not thinking twice, said yes.
So here I am with George (who is intertwining around my legs and preventing me from moving very well) walking aimlessly around C-ville (I have NO FRICKEN CLUE as to where we are at). On our first journey we came in contact with a few colligate males and made quick friends (I finally understand why so many single people get dogs). After convo we continue up a very busy street. I thank God that George was a little smarter than me at the moment because I wasn't walking straight, nor was I paying much attention to cars when we attempt to cross the road. Luckily we made it safely out of the busy section. In the next neighboring area we saw a cat. George doesn’t do anything at first so I start to get upset and yell “Get that damn cat!” and then I start running toward it myself. He quickly picks up on what I’m doing and then goes into a very manly-dog mode. We ended up scaring the living daylights out of the cat; it will now have terrible nightmares of a drunk girl and smelly dog running after it. It's moments like that, that bring a tear to my eye.
I took George on several walks throughout the evening and I don’t think that the Ryan even knew. All the better - seeing I barley remember them.
**
On another note – GO TWINS!
I’m so ecstatic about us making it to the playoffs.
It feels good to be from MN right now.
Best quote from a few days back:
“We still have to win a division title," Hunter said. "I've been drinking, but I'm playing tomorrow. I may have my best game tomorrow ... hung over!"
**
And the major high-light of my week....
2008 - National Republican Convention in the TWIN CIITIES!!!!!
...just a minor detail.
9.22.2006
Lessons from Independence Ave.
But at least it gets you a cleared bar tab.
**
NEVER yell "I hate the Red Sox" in an east coast bar. I almost got in a fight (granted I was also the one who said, "Do you wanna fight?!")
No one ever feels good after a shut-out, come on Twins.
**
You know you're getting old when you no longer drunk dial (because you know it's rude) so instead you drunk e-mail. (we're pathetic, I know)
**
We need better DC cops - apparently shouting and waving at them in a very disturbing manner and saying words like "terrorists" and "bombs" causes no reaction. (Granted I'm sure they weren't worried about two twenty-something white females from MN. Just you wait, the next person to cause some real damage will be some Scandinavian, Lutheran from no-mans-land Minnesota.)
9.21.2006
Cassutopia
Here's her info (in bold) and my responses (regular):
Don’t email – I only do when my family asks me to – tell the family you are trying to kick a bad habit
Don’t call – Haven’t done that since 2004 (minus one bad incident in Fall 05) what happened in 05 should stay in 05 and not travel to 06 or beyond!
Don't text - Don't Very PROUD
Don’t look at his facebook/myspace – Didn’t until lately WELL STOP IT!
Erase his # - Don’t have it then I guess it’s hard to erase something you don’t have! GREAT
Put pictures and memories you might have around in a box and leave it in MINNESOTA - Don’t have any, I think Don’t go looking for any just to see if you do
Pretend he fell off the face of the planet – Really do. Tell everyone in my life not to mention him then. Refer to first
And the most helpful…don’t think happy thoughts about him. We are aiming for negative – LUVE IT. Most successful
She's right. And this better work because I'm sick of annoying dreams. I prefer to go back to the ones where I'm rich, living in a huge-ass place and ruling the world in some way or other....a place better known as Cassutopia.
9.18.2006
Idiot
An Ohio woman was arrested after falsely claiming that she received tainted chocolate milk from an Ohio grocery store, according to the Toledo Blade. The 25-year old told police that she found a plastic vial of medicine in a half-gallon jug of chocolate milk that she purchased from a Kroger store. According to the police report, the woman claimed that she found the medicine when she poured the milk into a glass. Police searched her apartment a day later and found several containers and a prescription for the same medicine he claimed was in her milk. She faces charges of a fifth-degree felony that is punishable by up to 12 months in prison and a $2,500 fine.
But when I read this, I end up feeling so much better about myself.
9.15.2006
I Miss College Bars
I laughed my ass-off; as will you when you read this. (okay it’s really just meant for those who either went to the U or lived around there). His little guide seems to be a fairly accurate.
Tom Horgen, Star Tribune
Back to school means back to the bars for the roughly two-thirds of University of Minnesota students who are 21 or older. If you're approaching drinking age, it should be your first time -- hockey players excepted. Here's one thing all of you should know: There's more to college bars than just getting smashed. It's about getting smashed with your brethren. You know, finding your niche, where you belong. To help, I've devised a little guide to help you navigate your stumbling odyssey into the U of M's bar scene.
For frat boys
Oh, my, it's a three-way tie: Sally's, the Library and Blarney Pub come in neck-and-neck for the most polo- collar popping, Abercrombie & Fitch-loving, shoeless flip-flopping, camo-shorts-wearing frat boys. Boo-yah!
For music lovers
No doubt: The Dinkytowner is still doing its thing, especially with all the great underground hip-hop it's been featuring lately. Also peep the surging Nomad World Pub, which has reggae fests, jazz series and all sorts of other music, from indie rock to world beat.
For bringing sexy back
All sofas. All vintage. The Kitty Cat Klub is, um, comfy. Bring a date, lounge about, make out in the photo booth. Fall in love.
For maximum grime
If you're looking for a real dive -- like, where they drink beer for breakfast -- look no farther than Palmer's.
For beer lovers
If you really care about all that beer you're funneling down your throat, you might wanna check out the Town Hall Brewery. Its wide selection includes originals and brews from all over the world.
For THE GREAT outdoors
There's nothing like drinking in the fresh air. Both the outdoor patio at Sgt. Preston's and the deck at Grandma's Saloon are great. But hurry before the snow hits.
For a date
Check the calendar at the Varsity Theater, because this venue is wildly diverse, from rock concerts, to plays, to movies, to salsa dancing.
For punks
Where else but the Triple Rock?
For a Margarita
Wow, Burrito Loco's upstairs bar is a dump, but they make a mean margarita.
For those stranded on Como
Don't worry, these quasi-dives have you covered: Manning's, Sportsmans Pub and American Sports Cafe.
For smokers
You can't smoke at Stub and Herb's but you can wail all day long about the ban with owner and ex-gubernatorial candidate Sue Jeffers.
As much as I would love to disagree with Mr. Horgen I can’t. He’s pretty much got the majority of it figured out. Granted there isn’t much to figure out. While reading his comments I thought about my own memories of these bars (and some others because I also lived in St. Paul).
Here was my take on some of the St. Paul/Minneapolis Bars that are frequently visited by U of M students:
When I want:
Crappy/cheap long islands, to sing obnoxiously on stage and meet really random frat boys – Blarney’s.
To enjoy an hour of “Ladies Night” and a load of skipping music,spilt popcorn and satisfy my taste buds with a Coney dog – Bullwinkles
To drink REALLY CHEAP beer – Sportys
To hangout with ALL of the U of M College of Ag – Campus (All American Sports Café)
Good patio time and sharing moments (not to mention their cheese fries yum!) – Sgt. Prestons
To feel really sleazy – Grandmas
Popcorn crazy, sorority girl city and best bud bouncers – Sallys
2 fo 1's every night and the other half of the COAFES – Ol’ Mex
Retro/Piano Bar/Polk Dancing – Nyes
To meet a rich/preppy boy and super popped collar mode – Plums
To meet a lawyer or decent man who actually has a real salary and 401(k) – The Independent (added bonus – purse hooks)
To feel very important and fabulous – Bar Fly
To see my closet friends, feel at home and kick-back with some great cosmos and awesome wait staff (better known as my home in 2005) – Sterbs.
(Please note: This occurred between the dates of 2004 and Spring of 2006)
So many memories and so many options.
9.13.2006
So Long Marshall Field's
A little part of me just died this week. It’s official. Marshall Fields is gone forever. I knew it was going to happen since a year ago when Federated bought out May Department stores. It’s ironic because I found out in about it during the same way I’m encountering my loss today….sitting in a chilly cubicle at work, attempting to do anything but actual work. The only difference is that this time I’m in DC and have a neighbor who is just was crabby about it. Co-worker Carrie, a Chicago native, reminded me about the death as soon as I walked in today. Minutes later she shouts above our ‘Great Wall of China’ (her cube wall), “Cassandra read this.” It was an article from the Chicago Tribune in regards to Macy’s sleazy approach to corrupting a good name in the Midwest (a good promo doesn’t consist of stupid $10 gift cards…hello….glad we can now afford a pair of socks). We are determined that Macy’s paid off the Tribune because the article was cheesy at best and in favor of Macys. Not a mere mention of the rage that many people in Chicago (and elsewhere) felt about the change. And to top that off, it made Mayor Daley sound like he didn’t care and I have sources that say otherwise.
This reminds me of back when Dayton’s went to the Marshall Field’s name. But I hurt five times as bad today as I did then. I remember back in 2001 when I the difficult time writing the longer name on my checks (from a young age my mother taught me to shop at Dayton’s). So I understand the pain that Chicago is feeling with this change. Granted our (MNs) change was a little different with no buy-outs but instead a “unified merger of Hudson’s, Marshall Field’s and Dayton’s.” But who can forget the number of Minnesotan’s that were upset over it? I won’t and it’s still a hot topic to this day. We felt invaded and stripped of a quality title. Granted I was only 17 at the time and a novice shopper, but it still took some time for me to learn to love Marshall Field’s.
But I don’t think that’s going to happen with Macy’s. I won’t give into their little ploys and crappy buyers. And let’s not forget the terrible service they have! The only thing that Macy’s had going for it in, my book, was their parade and that has taken a turn for the worse. I refuse to shop at Macy’s out here. So, I’m left with Nordstrom’s (which I’m slowly learning to love; luckily they have decent service in their shoe department) and Bloomingdales. But it’s not the same.
So I salute you, Marshall Field’s, my all-time favorite store that had service people who knew me by first name in the shoe department - may you rest in peace.
9.10.2006
Sunday Medicine
On Tuesday I’m having my first (of many) root canals take place.
Jealous? Hope not.
I’ve been in sincere pain since this past Thursday. Literally. I’ve averaged about 4.5 hours a sleep a night. Of course this all happened after I claimed that I wouldn’t drink a lick of alcohol until Foxfields. As one friend said “This is God’s way of getting back at you.” Jerk. I hope he’s right because I’m in such pain right now. Today is Sunday,
Sept. 10th…..better known as my father’s birthday. I gave him a quick call to say, “Happy Birthday and I love you.” Sadly, only mere minutes after making small talk I started to quiver and then crying (the pain is horrendous). So out of our 10 minutes convo, about 2/3’s of it was devoted to me and my pain. I felt horrible but I couldn’t hold back. Even though I felt horrible about it; my father said this to me…..”Well, you know what I’d do.” Me having no damn idea said, “Uh, no?” “Cass, you need to take a shot or three of whiskey or whatever.” DUH! On my little NO ALCOHOL escapade, I didn’t even think of that. I questioned him further but I felt like such an idiot. So as soon as I hung-up the phone I took my first straight shot of vodka for medicinal reasons at 1:30 pm on a Sunday afternoon.
And I’ve been mixing, shooting and downing drinks since then to rid of my pain unitl 9 am EST tomorrow. I’m going to beat this stupid thing, even if I have to become an alcoholic.
9.05.2006
Trains, Planes and Automobiles
But here’s the deal….we had a hurricane on the way, woohoo.
So here is the timeline of how my day went from 3 p.m. on:
3:00 p.m. Get off of work, it’s pouring rain out so I take the metro home.
3:45 p.m. Finally have everything packed and ready to go.
4:00 p.m. Walk my 5 blocks to the Rosslyn Metro only to get honked at by cars rushing by and splashing me. (Damn you stupid cars!!!)
4:10 p.m. Make my way down to the platform and findout that my train is stuck and being taken off of the track.
4:15 p.m. Call the cab company, they say 15-20 mins.
4:45 p.m. **notice that’s more than 15-20 mins** still no cab so I call and bitch.
4:50 p.m. Get in cab.
5:05 p.m. Get out of cab about 500 feet away from the doors and run like hell….the wind is picking up. Walk in to find that out of the 4 flights to MSP, mine is the ONLY ONE delayed.
5:15 p.m. Call friend at home to confirm later pick -up.
5:16 p.m. Saddle up to the bar and order a gin and tonic. Bar tender says, “Double.” (be proud) cause I said, “No.” Nice couple next to me say, “Yes.” Guess what; I got the double.
6:16 p.m. A few more drinks in and I’ve landed two new friends and a potential date. Yes people, the nice couple thought it’d be classic to set me up on a date with a friend of theirs. I did it for appeasement and because who the hell gets set-up on a date at the AIRPORT!?
6:40 p.m. I board the plane. By that time, happy and loud are the two best words to describe me. Feeling very important I decided to make convo with the two guys next to me. I’m sure they were annoyed 5 mins into the conversation. Luckily for me, I don’t remember much of it. And let the drinks pour on.
Switch to CST
8:30ish p.m. (I think that’s the time I landed) JR picks me up. But as an added bonus, I had to Daisy Duke my getting into his car. Nothing like providing some entertainment for a few people at the MSP Curbside pick-up area.
9:30 p.m. Sitting at Sporty’s and slurring my “I LOVE YOU” to my friends. I’m sure there were many kisses to be given/had and hugs. Not to mention some horrible karaoke moments. I believe I claimed the karaoke boy as being “gay” because he sang Garth Brook’s songs. (I don’t see the correlation now, but it seemed appropriate at the time.)
12:30 a.m. By this time I’m tired, so I give a call to a friend to pick me up. Deciding it was also an appropriate time to lay down with my legs in the air. Luckily he came soon afterwards and saved me from waking up with my hair stuck to the beer-laden floor.
It's moments like this when you look back and slowly watch youself go from being completely composed to, well, the exact opposite. But I wouldn’t have changed it for the world.
8.30.2006
MSF Crazy
My countdown is nearing its end for the MN State Fair. (3 days and I’ll be staring at the latest Butterhead carving) And I have proof as to why I'm such a State Fair fanatic - Genetics.
Proof: Convo with my mom a couple of days ago.
Me: “Hey, when is Dad working the Moo Booth?”
Mom: “Sunday.”
Me: “Wow, so I’ll probably be at the fair the entire time I’m home. Not sure when I’ll get to see everyone.” (feeling a little guilty)
Mom: “Well of course you’re going to be there everyday, it’s the reason you came home. You can see us whenever but the fair is only once a year.”
That was when I fully understood what it’s like to be Fair-minded and I blame it on my mom. Our conversation wasn’t the only moment of ridiculousness in regards me and the MSF this year. Even though I haven't beent there yet, doesn't mean I haven't rpepared by performing/doing the following:
- Rushing home last Wednesday night to go online and see who was crowned Princess Kay 53
- Tearing up when I read the Strib article on the new Miracle of Birth Center
- Scheduling a time to meet up with my old boss’ at the Fair
- Checking the Strib everyday to see the latest Fair story
- Calling home to make sure Dad is working the Moo Booth so I can help
- Mentally prepare myself to hold back tears when I enter the Empire Commons (a.k.a Dairy Building)
- Yelling at my friend via phone when he called to tell me he was standing in the barn and wanted to let me know that “cows are stupid.” (it’s a amazing we’re still friends after that)
- ‘Educating’ my co-workers on a daily basis about the many wonders/facts about my home Fair.
So we all know of my problem….err, well at least one of them. And yes, I am a tad biased when it comes to who has the best State Fair. A friend of mine argued MN doesn’t come out as numero uno in the contest for Best State Fair. I disagree. I find it interesting that she backs her reason with just one little thing….that her state is more focused on Ag and 4-H. Now, seeing I’m a part of that industry, I can’t complain. But I can argue. Yes, for many years, the livestock exhibits and shows were what made a fair. But we have to remember that we are an ever changing society. I can tell you that MN ranks number two for most highly attended State Fair in the country (just behind Texas with an avg attendance of 1.6 million). Not bad for having a fairly low state population. And I can also inform you that we have one of the most innovative fairs; offering more for the consumer than just food-on-a-stick.
In accordance to the MN State Fair’s website it states the following:
About Us
The Minnesota State Fair is a financially self-supporting
quasi-state agency. The annual production of the State Fair, along with all
improvements and maintenance of the 320-acre State Fairgrounds, are financed
exclusively through revenue produced by the State Fair's year-round operations.
The State Fair has received no public money of any kind since 1949.Our Mission
Our mission is to educate and involve our guests by providing a world-class showcase that is innovative, entertaining and fun.We strive to:
Showcase Minnesota’s finest agriculture, art and industry
Present an unparalleled forum for knowledge and ideas
Provide outstanding customer service
Offer exceptional value
Provide a safe, clean environment that is accessible to all
Create unique experiences
This statement shows that we strive to bring three aspects together on what makes Minnesota great. Personally I’d like to believe agriculture does it all be itself, but it doesn’t. MN is made up of diverse and intriguing sectors and that is what should be showcased at its Fair.
As for what the ag industry is doing, we have more hands-on educational exhibits now than we did just 5 years ago – that’s a good sign. As our society grows further away from the farm we need to adapt to their tastes. People come to eat new foods (on-a-stick is for convenience), to learn and be entertained. I’m sorry, but watching cows in a show ring is BORING…..and that’s sad when I say that. But it’s true. Not to mention, that doesn’t show the average city/suburban kid what ag is about. Having a hands-on booth educating a consumer on where their food comes from is 500x more informative and interesting for a consumer. So when they are slurping down their milkshake why not have info on dairy right next door, nothing like making a little profit and while teaching them what farming consists of. Now that is the new mindset of agriculture at the fair.
So that my rant on why I love the MSF. You can disagree. But never will I turn my nose up to my own state and its fair. That’s just not kosher.
8.28.2006
Monday Morning Weekend
Co-worker: "So Cassandra, how was your weekend."
Me: "Fine, yours?"
C0-worker: "Good, we went to __________"
Me: "Yeah, we did the usual. We went to _________ and had a good/bad/okay/awesome time."
C0-worker: "Cool."
Then we go back to our offices/cubes and click away on our computers.
For the most part that was my convo today but looking back at it, I didn't have an awesome weekend, nor did I have a bad one. I had good things but plenty of not-s0-good things happened too. Actually I think they kind of equaled each other out.
Good: The Twins beating the White Sox on Friday and Saturday
Bad: The Twins losing to the White Sox on Sunday
- some may argue two wins is better than one loss, but people, we are talking baseball here, it's very, very important and no losses are accepted.
Good: Amanda’s Bocce Ball party and shots with the Aussie on Saturday afternoon
Bad: The martinis hitting me hard at a private party on Saturday night
Good: Being mistaken as Susan Allen
Bad: Hearing complaints about macaca
Good: The Legwarmers 80’s cover band on Friday night
Bad: ½ of the crowd at the concert
Good: Going out everyday/night for the past 10 days.
Bad: Sleep deprivation
Good: No NWA strike
Bad: Recent plane crash
-I fly to MSP on Friday
Good: Santroum polls/outlook
Bad: Kennedy polls/outlook
So, looking back you could say that I had an undesribable weekend because in all reality nothing was outstanding or horrible.
(These are only in real relation to me....the plane crash was a terrible tragedy.)
8.24.2006
Don't Marry Me
When mentioning this article (before showing it) to a few male friends they started in with the question of, “are you considered a career woman?” According to the article a ‘career woman’ isn’t the “girl who’s pushing buttons on a cash register,” no she’s the one who’s working more than 35 hours a week, has an income of over $30,000 and a college degree or higher. So I guess I make the cut.
This man who wrote the article leaves me with a few assumptions about his personal life. If he’s married, he’s either got a wife at home barefoot and pregnant or he is unhappily married to a career woman. OR he’s not married because he holds the “don’t marry a career woman belief.” I'm going with the unhappily married man to a career woman who's on the brink of divore because he can't handle sharing domestic and fiscal responsiblity.
Even though Mr. Noer backs up his article with research that hails from credible sources (i.e. major journals) I am still skeptical about such a bold statement. Maybe it’s because I grew-up with a career mom who sent me off to day-care and had to juggle between work and family time. Granted my father is a farmer and was around home but let’s face it, the man couldn’t do the laundry, dishes or anything domestic for that matter. (I was proud that he learned how do use the oven when I was in H.S.) With both parents working I think that they were more understanding of each other and felt good that both could contribute financially.
What I’m trying to get across is that a marriage is what you make it. Obviously if people want to have a career and don’t care about family or relationships, then they shouldn’t bother getting married. But if you want a career and the family thing, you set priorities. It can be done and there are millions of successful and happily married people out there to prove it.
So if you want to think like Mr. Noer out there go ahead, I’m not going to stop you. Just don’t bother calling over 50% of the single women out there….. and that includes me.