Globesity......

So the World Health Organization is on a full force of recognizing the latest global trend - obesity - better known at 'globesity' to them. While just finishing up reading an article about this latest 'tragedy' I went on to check the lastest headlines sent out daily by IFDA and one of the top retail articles was about McDonald's in China with a delivery service.

Okay. Moment to breathe before I rant and a few points I will not deny.....
1. I will use delivery service (but rarely)
2. I enjoy fast food
3. I believe it is your own perrogative when it comes to health and nutrition

Now with that out of the way:

HOW LAZY CAN ONE GET not only do you want fast food but it comes delivered to your door? I would like to pretend that it's worth consuming if I made the initial attempt to walk/bike/transport myself there. I will give cheers to Mikie'Ds for aknowledging consumer needs/demands by including healthier options on their menu. But I will jeer for opening up a delivery method.

(yes, you can argue this through and through...but it's more like me being mad at not only myself but others too when it comes to taking care of one's health.)

*****

Five Days until Christmas Update.....
My Stats: flying 1,836 miles, driving 800 miles and consuming about 10 lbs of food. Oy.

I'm still not up-to-date with my shopping.

*****

Someone told me that Cornell's hockey is #1 (They lost to Harvard!). I giggled. Not that the U is #1...but at least we're ranked.

Uh oh!

My roommate informed me this past weekend that I have left the oven on. Not once, but five times since I've moved in two months ago. Not cool. The odd thing is, I have never done that before (at least unintentially). It also doesn't make sense for the fact that I haven't been using the oven anymore often than I have in the past.

Well the oven is one thing but now guess what I forgot? Yep, a burner on the stove. Yesterday. My roommate left a voicemail about it. I don't blame her. Even though I remember turning the knob (because of oven issues, I must not have turned it off all the way. Word. Don't light anything in our house.....it make not be pretty.

So this morning I decided to load myself with protein before going to the gym so I made up a nice 'ol Salsa & Cheese Omelet. That, of course, required me to use the stove. I shut the burner off and then did a double check and headed out the door.

(Skip ahead a half hour)

So I'm at the gym and movin' along on my cardio workout, watching the local news. On flashes a "News Update" - a row house in west Philly (I live in West Philly...kinda) was on fire.

What went through my mind......."OH CRAP!!!"

But, it wasn't my house. "Phew."

The the Award Goes To!

I really had no decent title. I'm actually just sitting here and procrastinating. A week from today is Christmas day. Am I prepared? Nope. Do I have my shopping done? Far from. Are your plans set? Pretty sure not.

What do I know?

I know that I'm flying in on Friday and coming back on Wednesday. I know that there will be food, family and gifts and church. At what time and order....not a darn clue.

I'm okay with it though. I want to see my cows and ride snowmobile for a bit. And perhaps see a friend or two. Doubt that will happen though.

This is killing me. Not knowing the plans. It's partially because of me and partially because of my family.

But I'm going to continue to sit here and procrastinate by blogging (obviously) and writing emails for work.

Though here's a few things I'm tiring quick of right now:
- People complaining about 'cold' weather (it's in the 30's and '40s here!...let's call those in the Midwest with no heat!)
- People using the excuse to not respond due to the holiday (ummm...unless you're traveling and like, not a good excuse, respond people!)
- Eating my weight in goodies (this is my fault, but I'm still complaining!)
- People bragging about how they are done with shopping.
- How slow the days are going, leading up to Christmas, oy!!!

But I'm happy for this....
My family. They rock. They got me tickets for the NCAA Big Ten Wrestling tournament in March. AWESOME!!

Thank you Comcatst. Not.

***Note from my University in regards to the Big Ten Network***
Dear University of Minnesota Alumnus:

We want to bring you up to date on the Big Ten Network (BTN). With many of our
Gopher football games being aired on the Big Ten Network and with 19 men’s
basketball games and 10 women’s basketball games scheduled to be aired, we have
received phone calls, letters, and e-mails from Gopher fans who are frustrated
that those broadcasts are not available on the state’s largest cable systems.

The Big Ten Network, which launched just three months ago, has been in the
works for nearly three years. Its development included input from conference
officials, university presidents, athletic directors, faculty representatives,
and others. In their opinion, the establishment of a network that would focus
on our schools and student-athletes was the right thing to do to ensure the
long-term stability of Big Ten athletics from a recruiting standpoint, a
financial standpoint, and a marketing standpoint.

From the outset, the network was offered to all satellite and cable providers.
The only non-negotiable BTN demand was that the network be included in the
expanded basic package within the Big Ten region. Within 30 days of launch, BTN
was in nearly 30 million homes nationwide—the most successful launch of its
kind in cable television history. It is being carried on DIRECTV, Dish Network,
and approximately 157 cable systems, including several in the state of
Minnesota, and all are offering the Big Ten Network on their expanded basic
lineup at no additional charge to subscribers.

Unfortunately, the three major cable carriers in Minnesota—Comcast, Charter,
and Mediacom—have chosen not to carry the Big Ten Network. The local contacts
of those companies have a long history of supporting Gopher athletics, but the
decision not to carry the network is being made outside of Minnesota.

We’ve heard from cable company spokespeople that BTN is too expensive. But if
small cable companies in Minnesota such as Hiawatha Broadband in Winona,
Consolidated Telephone Company in Brainerd, and Ace Communications in Houston
can negotiate a price that is acceptable, why can’t Comcast, Charter, and
Mediacom do the same?

We’ve heard from the cable companies that the Big Ten Network does not belong
on expanded basic cable, and that their customers shouldn’t have to pay for a
channel they may not watch. Review the lineup of 70 or so channels that are
currently included on your expanded basic cable package; we think you’ll agree
that the Big Ten Network would be among the more popular channels in that
lineup. Again, if the smaller cable operators, DIRECTV, and Dish are placing it
on expanded basic, why can’t Comcast, Charter, and Mediacom?

We’ve heard cable spokespeople say that you don’t need to get BTN because all
the good games are on ABC, ESPN, and other stations already on their expanded
basic. We would suggest that Gopher fans don’t need to be told by the cable
companies which games are “the good games.” Most Gopher fans would agree that
the good games are those in which the Gophers play. Our last football game
against Wisconsin was a great example.

The role of our athletic department and university—much like the role of the
local folks at Comcast, Charter, and Mediacom—is limited. We are doing all we
can to assist the Big Ten Network staff in their negotiations. But, simply put,
until the major cable companies are willing to negotiate, our role in the
process will remain extremely limited.

We’ve often been asked if there is anything Gopher fans can do to help us work
our way through this situation. Here are a few suggestions:

First, when discussing this issue, please share the information in this letter.
There are always two sides to a story, and we think the information in this
letter can help counter some of the misinformation in the numerous negative ads
being run by some cable companies.

Second, if you feel comfortable doing so, we ask that you continue to try to
contact your local cable provider and let them know that you want the Big Ten
Network on your expanded basic lineup, and that even though you have not made
the switch to satellite, that doesn’t mean you don’t have an interest in BTN.
Tell them you’re a Gopher fan; remind them that they are the temporary holders
of a municipally-regulated cable franchise in your area and are obligated to
respond to your community and its programming mandates.

Finally, please understand that most of you do have options. The Big Ten
Network is available throughout Minnesota on DIRECTV and Dish Network.
Switching from cable to satellite is not something that everyone wants to do,
but it is available and it is an option to most households in Minnesota.
Increasingly, it is an option that is being acted upon. In the state of
Minnesota, for instance, we’re told that nearly 30 percent of households now
have satellite TV and that number continues to rise.

In summary, a successful Big Ten Network is good for the University of
Minnesota and Gopher athletics. It provides unprecedented marketing
opportunities, a distinct recruiting advantage, and a steady, guaranteed stream
of incremental revenue over a 20-year period that will help Minnesota remain a
nationally competitive athletic department. It’s a network about your
student-athletes, your teams, and your school. We want to thank all of you who
have contacted us in recent weeks. We hear you. We share your concerns. Please
know that we will continue our efforts to bring broad distribution of the Big
Ten Network to Gopher fans in every corner of this great state of Minnesota.

Thank you for your patience and for your continued support of Golden Gopher
Athletics.

Go Gophers!

Bob Bruininks Joel Maturi
President Director of Athletics

----------------------------------------------------------------------
University of Minnesota
Department of Alumni Relations
200 Oak Street, Suite 200, Minneapolis, MN 55455-2040
800-862-5867 umalumni@umn.edu


I guess a certain cable company will be getting a few letters and phone calls from someone.

I Bleed.....Maroon & Gold

The more I'm away from my alma mater the more I miss it and cherish it. The other day I found myself perusing the UBookstore for various items, originally meant as gifts for my nieces and nephew only to purchase a number for myself too!

And that leads to another thing...neither parent of my nieces and nephew are Alums. Nope. My oldest brother (their father) graduated from a UW school and their mom from another MNSCU school. Though my other brother and myself are Maroon and Gold through and through and believe that our nieces and nephew should be too. It only seems appropriate that the kids be decked out in proper U wear when attending a Gopher Wrestling meet to which my family has had season tickets for years.

The crazy thing is, I didn't start at the U. I started an out of state school with intentions on graduating there with a VMD. But after those two years I found myself lacking a family beyond my academic deparment. So I transferred and I fell in love with the school that I was so worried would keep me back. Yeah, it's big and it's city-esque. Perhaps you become a bit of a number and it does take a lot for you to be noticed. I may have griped about the lack of U tradition as opposed to my previous school or the fact that PC was the biggest concern on campus over really expressing your voice.

Those were complaints then. Now I'm proud.

I had the opportunity to visit an Ivy League school with a friend. Now this friend was known by EVERYONE. He was the guy who organized everything, who became friends with the Admin and threw the parties. We could barely walk 10 ft without being stopped. When visiting his college (old dormitory where he lived for 4 years) the new onsite Reagent greeted him by first name, even though they had never worked directly together. The Reagents' wife was introduced to me briefly, as was her husband and by the end of the 20 minutes we were socializing around I became a slight part of the family. When walking out the door the couple thanked me (by first name) for coming. Not something you get back home. Again, this school is about 1/7th the size of the U.

I have to admit, I was jealous. The camaraderie and the networks were amazing. But then I started to think back to my time at the U. I loved it. I loved the challenge to be known; and I had beat that challenge. I joined 5 clubs and became involved in a variety of organizations around the university. It got to a point where I complained about not being able to walk to class without stopping and talking to someone. My network may not, at the time, seemed as diverse or haughty but I will beg to differ now. My network includes those in finance, agriculture, politics, medical and the list goes on. And these are good, down-to-earth, people who care about voices being heard through their work. They worked hard on a campus where you can easily become a number. You don't get handouts at the U. There are services, but you alone have to make that first move to be something and I think that is more important than just getting the services handed to you.

So now I'm becoming a Life Member next year of the Alum Assoc and I have taken on the challenge of reviving the area Alum Chapter in my new city. I will continue to clothe my family in U wear, cheer (and jeer) my sports teams and, eventually, I can make out a nice big donation check to my school. I believe in it and I'm proud.

That's right....I bleed Maroon and Gold and I'm proud of it.

Addicted to New Radio & Challenge

That's it. I'm addicted. To news radio. Who would have thought? I didn't plan on it but I was tired of the radio station that I had been listening to during work hours and wanted to mix it up a bit so I decided to give MPR News Radio a try, And now I'm hooked. I'm in love. Much of it may be due to the fact that it focuses a lot on the caucuses right now or that it gives continuous MN news (which I crave) or that it has the NPR Science Fridays! Whatever it is....it's working.

The best part is that it doesn't distract from my work like music sometimes has a habit of doing. And the plus side, I find myself a little more knowledgable about the going ons back home and nationally. I consider it a good deal.

And now the challenge.....(I'm changing topic here)

I have a new challenge and I'm EXCITED. I had contacted the Chapter President the Alum group in my new home area of Philly. He responded promptly, thanking me for contacting him but had to admit that the local chapter has been a bit "dormant for a while" but they need "new energetic people like 'me'", thus leading me to mastermind how I can revitalize an Alum Chapter. I may not have been considered for my colleges Alum Director postition (long shot but thought I'd try) but I think I can handle this. I'm sure there's a number of UMAAers lurking around this area. I just need to capture them and our little Alum empire!

Any suggestions/advice is well accepted:)

A little bit of inspiration.

IKEA Pres. Pernille Lopez talks leadership - News

Long story, ask me about it. You may be surprised.

I workout to watch TV.

True statement. You see, not too long ago a friend of mine made a comment stating that she went to the gym just so she could watch cable TV cause she was too cheap to purchase it herself. I didn't blame her because she is paying her way through law school even though, it made me chuckle and shake my head.

Though, I have come to realize that I just may be doing the same thing! Last night I found myself conitinuing on with my workout even though I was way past my time (it beeped and stopped recording my distance!) just because I wanted to see the last 10 minutes of "Hogan Knows Best"! Crazy. I know.

You see...we (my roommate and I) have basic cable right now. And it's not that we're cheap, we just don't find it necessary to upgrade since we are always at work or traveling. But with that I often find myself scheduling my workouts around what is going to be on cable TV at the gym each night. Yep. That's right. I'm doing exactly what said friend did. Call it pathetic or call it clever; your choice, but you can't deny that it's darn thrifty! (point: I pay $10/month in membership dues and upgrading cable would be at leat another $40/month....do the math)

So instead of becoming a couch potato I am a fit girl who knows who "I Love New York 2" is going for. (I can't believe I just admitted to that! Darn you Vh1!!!)

White Christmas

I remember last year when my mom asked me if I was going to put up any Christmas decorations. I said no. Not that I don't like Christmas...that's far from it. Even though there were a few other variables to the equation of the 'no' (i.e. I was broke, we had a cat that would find a way to kill itself with the tinsle and really wasn't much space for a wreath, long behold a tree). The main reality was...being far away from home, it didn't feel like Christmas. Sure I was living in a city that took the holiday's and RAN with it (Can you say 10 parties in 18 days?! Uffda!). When you looked beyond the huge decorated trees in the Whitehouse, the lights amongst the Georgetown streets and the "umpteenth" piece of Christmas chocolate - it wasn't Christmas. Why? It just wasn't the way we prepared/celebrated for it back home. Yeah, we had parties and got dressed up but there were deeper moments to it too.

Such as....

1) Attaching Christmas lights to the barn while standing 25 ft in the air in a shakey John Deere feed bucket.
2) Running through the snow from the shop in the main yard to the house with the dog.
3) Evening walks from the barn to the house when all that is on is the Christmas lights and the sound of the ice/snow cracking beneath my boots.
4) Seeing the "Northern Star" on top of the Harvestor (silo) from miles away and getting the feeling that all is right in the world.
5) Helping my mom with various (once annoying) tasks of prepping the house (Think Studio 56, New England Series!).
6) The feeling you get when they light the Advent candle every Sunday....
7) Seeing family more often throughout the month and giving and recieving homemade goodies.
8) Watching various Christmas shows on TV with my mom and her crying (e.g. It's a Wonderful Life).
9) Taking 15 minutes in the morning just to put on all the warm Carhartt clothing to go outside and feed the baby calves.
10) Dad and I making fun of mom for listening to Christmas music NONSTOP.

It's not the same anymore...nor will it ever be. I will do a little decorating but the real Christmas time will not be until I come down the driveway at the farm on the 21st.

Bad Cheesesteak....

A bad cheesesteak....errr…..wrap!? That’s what Philly gets (a bad wrap…). So it’s a city that poses itself a little rough on the edges. In all reality, it’s pretty cute and cuddly once you look past the (dropping) crime rate and homicides. Not to mention, it’s fabulously full of art, food and culture. It has a little something for everyone. Whether you’re a crazy ass sports fan or love to go to 1st Fridays to view the latest on the art scene they (ahem, WE) have it.

I’m not going to lie. When I first moved to Philly I didn’t know much beyond the Rocky movies and the two stops I made for cheesesteaks while I was on my way to Atlantic City. At that time I viewed it with simple pleasure of ‘another large city.’ In all reality, I didn’t think what I thought of the city would really matter, ever. Funny thing....just a few months after my 2nd pass-through I was visiting for another reason. A job. Again, I didn’t look into it much. And I pretty much took the job based on a two things 1) I needed to move on from ‘then’ current job and 2) I LOVEEEEEE the Rocky movies which had to equal to me loving the city. Made sense, no?

Luckily, it is true. I love this city. I love that it’s not preppy nor is it a slum. I love that it’s not full of crazies of one kind (e.g. political hacks or hippies or white trash). It’s pretty diverse place with it all (okay, there isn’t much for politics here). Yeah, you have your shady parts….but need I remind myself that just a few blocks from my highly esteemed Big 10 University and our very own U.S. Capitol are some of the most shady ‘hoods you can find out there. Plus, more homicides have occurred within a mile of where I lived in my previous two cities than they have in my new neighborhood. Nice.

So the next time you hear that there’s been another homicide or Philly was named the “City of Uglies” again, hop on a plane and visit me. I can prove it all wrong.

Easy Mac....Ain't that Easy

True Story:

(E-mail)

Date: 11/26/07
To: Friends
From: The Idiot (me)
RE: How dumb am I?

Okay -

I found this great Mac & Cheese product today when I was at Harris Teeter. It's Easy Mac, easier than EVER!! It's already in a microwaveable cup....all you have to do is add water.

Guess what I forgot to do?

Yep. Forgot the water. Our office now smells of burnt noodles cause I'm an idiot and forgot to add water. I was THAT excited over showing the new product to my boss that I popped it in the nuker before adding the H2O.

I just won the "idiot" award for the YEAR

Best Reply:

And they let you go to Egypt?

****

And this is for the lady who created a traffic hold up in the gym parking lot last night. I don't care if it was chilly out. How LAZY are you when you drive to the gym and then wait 8 minutes (following a gym-goer to their car) just so you can park four spots closer to the front door?! Lady, need I remind you that you are at the gym to get EXERCISE. Guess what a few extra steps gives you???? THAT'S RIGHT! Exercise! Amazing, isn't it? And don't worry, you only made about 3 cars wait while you sat there hogging up the parking lot waiting for the person to walk (slowly) to their car, get in and then finally leave. You managed to be both rude and lazy. Congrats.

uggs

There are a lot of things in fashion that I do not get. The most recent one being Uggs. What the hell? Right now while waiting for my Thanksgiving flight home I have witnessed about 10 people with them. First of all, I think they are ugly. It's like some cartoon character should be wearing them. Then there is the whole 'practicality' of them. I have seen COLD and SNOW only a few times since their major arrival. Example, it is currently 60 degees out......do you really NEED to be wearing what constitutes as snow boots? If so, then I totally forgot to wear my insulated Carhartts!

What I am saying is that A) you are crazy for wearing those hideous things when it's so warm out and B) you are a complete sucker to waste money on something you can get the functional equivalent at Fleet Farm for way less$$.

But that is just my opinion.

The New Britney?

I'm listening to MPRs' The Current and what do I hear? The song, "Baby One More Time" and it's not Ms. Spears. Nope. It's Fountains of Wayne

I like them but now I don't know what to think. Were they on crack when they said, "Hey! Let's sing a Britney Spears song!!" Cause that is the ONLY thing that would make sense to me. C'mon boys!

By the way, fave sone of theirs (which is featured on their site) is "Strapped for Cash," amazing.

'Drive' Me Nuts

Scene: AADPI office 8:41 am. Boss at his desk, co-worker at his typing away.

Me: walk by in a huff and plop bag down on chair. "Hrmph."
Boss: peeks around his cube, "Nice to see you all in smiles!" in an overly chipper voice.
Me: stomp over to him, "Well let's just say I'm for a state mandated driving etiquette test. I'm sick of all of these rude drivers and I'm tired of this crazy commute!"
Boss: a man who commutes at least 3 hrs a day, "Oh, I'm so sorry." (in complete and utter sarcasm)
Me: realizing I can't complain, "Whatever." plop into chair and type away.

In the past 48 hrs people have become as stupid does as stupid gets. I know, that doesn't make much sense but it's the nicest way of complaining about the idiot drivers. The etiquette is easy........ for busy on ramps, you go every other. Don't try to shove a car with 50 cars behind them off the side of the road. Or how about the person who changes the lanes 20 times to get ahead without even using their blinker?! Oh and my favorite, the person who doesn't even see the billion signs saying that only oncoming traffic (this is in a busy parking lot) can take that route, hence closing the gap for any outgoing traffic.

The latter was today. First, I'll embarrassingly admit that I was in a drive-thru line for a certain restaurant. The thing with this is that it's smack close to the bank infront of a Montessori school (i.e. there's little room for moving). I starting to go into the lane only to realize it's the "out" lane for outbound traffic. But I corrected in time and got in line (Note: The drive-thru lane is split by this "out" road). The thing is, there were a thousand signs for our drive-thru lane and a very apparent line which I was the tail of. Well this car comes up the "out" lane to get in line, hence cutting me off and blocking the "out" traffic flow.

I'm a little ticked but think she will overcome her obliviousness and figure out why I'm just chillin' right next to her. But nope, she doesn't. She just sits there. And then a car comes to the out lane and see's her blocking it. They attempt to show her it's their lane, but she stays oblivious. I'm getting annoyed and the "out" car turns around and makes a very illegal detour. Really, how can you miss the signs, miss the apparent line and then ignore a car standing right infront of you?

And to top it all off.....I saw that she's busy slurping down a soda from the fast food chain across the road. Really woman, I feel guilty as it is going to this place but look at you! You obviously have already been to one, why are you at another one and being dumb and not reading the stupid signs?!?!?! Gah!

Read the signs people. It's amazing how much your driving etiquette will improve.

p.s. I got fed-up and just left. I couldn't handle any more of the abusurdity.

Thoughts on the Side

I just spent the weekend up in New Haven, CT for the Yale vs. Harvard game. Even though I didn't attend either school I have close relations with many of Yalie family. This all started with one friend I made during my time in DC. Over time I was adopted by the DC Yale Alumni group; them becoming my home base for friends and events. With the level of surrogate for my 'alum' family I ended up being invited to attend the Y-H game in New Haven. I was, at first, a bit apprehensive seeing I wasn't a real alum and I didn't grow-up with an Ivy league background, but I figured that it wasn't too odd seeing I DID play on their Alum Softball team and helped host a few events. So I gave in and went. And OH MY GOSH. It was so FUN! I'll give it to them; they know how to tailgate. Though their football team is far from the level of the SEC, Big 12 or Big Ten....they at least knew how to have a good time.

I spent the majority fo the game day on the Alumni Tailgate field and by the end I was the girl....
- who's uncle is Dick Cheney
- TD '03
- Studied philosphy
- Midwestern Yalie
- Flag runner
- Girl who knew what Corn Hole was (the game)

It was fun. Not my Gophers....but close enough.

Informed... Are you?

I think I sometimes know more of what's happening back home than those who live there. Yes, I read the Strib online almost daily and listen to about 4 hours of The Current a day (which can be confusing when they give the weather reports; forgetting that I don't live there when I look out my window and see no signs of the announced rain!).

I didn't realize how much I keep track of until recently. Here's the past occurences that have brought me to the realization:
1. E-mailed an article about a Benson, MN election re-count to my aunt (in Benson)
2. Told my Grandma up in Felton what her weather is suppose to be like for the weekend.
3. Texted my cousin to remind him to get me the new Cities 97 Mixer that just came out.
4. Called and left a voicemail for my mom informing her of the electronics recycling days at MOA (today through Saturday).
5. Posted they recylcing article on my FB profile for friends to see.
6. Checked and called about the latest committee hearings for agriculture in MN.

That all happened in the last two days. Maybe I am insane but I do also have my own weather page where I can track the weather for Philly, DC, Waterville (home) & the TC. I do watch the local news for Philly, read a few DC blogs and the WSJ. Oh and perhaps I may check a few gov websites too....(USTR.gov & USDA.gov).

I like to be informed.

So people don't forget to recycle your electronics, get your emissions checked, donate clothing (it's gettin' cold out there!) & food to shelters! Good citizens = less need for govn't!

Where were you two weeks ago!?

Hrmph! I'm grouchie. "Why," you may ask.... well it's because of Papa John's.

Now first of all, let's get this clear. I love their pizza. It's the only kind that I have ate for weeks straight and never tired of it. The dough is just right and well the cheese is the utmost cheesiest. Other than that, they just seem to do it for me. Nothing fancy but not that bad of quailty either.

So the reason why I'm seething. . . .

Two weeks ago I thought it would be excellent to call them on the way home from work, equalling perfect timing to swing in and pick-up the 'za. Good idea right? I thought so. So I google the my local PJ number and punch it in. Two rings and a female answers in a muffled voice saying, "Wellshhhh oh PHapa Joooons *static*" and then flips me to an annoying recording about PJ deals. Three minutes later (which feels like enternity) I hang-up thinking maybe I'd done something wrong. So I dial again. Get the same thing. I go for a third round and was sent, yet again, to the recording. Tell me, how busy are you on a Thursday at 8 pm to be doing this? Especially in my neighborhood where it's dead by 6pm. I gave up, seeing I was almost home and chose to make mac and cheese instead. A far cry from my BBQ Hawaiian Chicken pizza.

I was sad.

And now I found that you can TEXT your friggin' order.....

Oh PJ....you better not let me down on this one.

And if you were wondering; yes, I do have an online account with them. What can I say, I'm a fan of convienence.

Buzz Kill

You know you're over someone totally when you see a picture of them (by random) and think "Oh God......I liked that?!" And then the next thought being...."FINALLY!" It was so nice. Just had to throw that one in there cause it just happened to me.

Anyway, things are getting back to normal for once. Nothing crazy. Egypt is done. I'm back and it's good. Business is good. I still do my typical weekend of heading down to DC but I'm finding it quite tiring. Trust me, I'm not going there for kicks and giggles. This past weekend it was for my bestfriends birthday and then I had the joy of getting two crowns, for my teeth. Yes, I'm back to having my horrible teeth being takin' care of. Seriously, if I ever end up homeless it's because of all the dental work I need to pay for. Just think, for what I paid for yesterday I could have gotten a the new Burberry hand bag that I've been dying to get, or pay for 2.5 months of rent. Whatever would have deemed more necessary.

And for those of you back in the TC. I do plan on being home for Thanksgiving. I will be around the area for a drink or two on Friday (Nov. 23rd). If I don't get ahold of you beforehand it's because I have a horrible memory and/or secondly, I'm lazy. Probably the latter of the two. But if you're free let me know. I'm sure I'll want the 'regular' (i.e. Sterbs for beer and cheese curds).

This isn't Chicago?

Well my first real round of int'l travel is done...errr...well kinda seeing I have yet to land on US soil. It was a good trip where I not only learned a lot about my very own product (please note that I had been with my new co.less than 3 wks when I left for Egypt) so needless to say it was very educational.

I am happy that I got to go there (the ME) before heading to Korea or Japan. There are several reasons for this. First of all; businessmen in the ME remind me of old conservative men from my grandfathers day. Yes, they see me as this young girl who knows little, but for some odd reason that only makes me want to fight harder for a sale. The other reason is that the EU had much influence over the ME. Most people know English well. And thirdly, prior to my new job, I had made some good contacts within the industry, so I knew who I was going to be dealing with. Oh, and I can't overlook the fact that I LOVE ME food. Though I wish they were cool with pork. I don't think I could live without pork in my diet.

Baker for a Day

Today was my first full day in Cairo, Egypt. It was a beautiful day; I think.... You see, I was never outside. I instead woke up, thew on some clothes and stumbled down to on of the many kitchens at the Sheraton. That is correct. I spent the day baking.

Funny thing is, I loved it. It was me, a food science professor and my old boss. We did several applications with some using my products. They turned out amazing! Thus, it makes my job a billion times easier.

I think tommorow I will at least attempt to see a pyramid or two before I get back to the kitchen; supposedly they are pretty big. (Ha). I do like this place so far and have found the people quite charming.

Painful Joy

Iam sitting at the Heathrow airport right now and bored beyond all means. My flight does not board for another five hours....argh. But I must remember that I signed up for this. It is cool to be cosidered a world traveler but more so, nowadays, it's almost like a feat. The long waits, security giving you mile long lists of rules for baggage and of course the infamous flight delays.

My family is proud that I have no issues with trapsing around the world by myself. I guess I am too. I forget that I work in such a small sector; one where your co-workers are overseas a good part of the year. I think nothing of booking a flight to Seoul or giving a trade office in the UAE a ring. All things are int'l to me.

I am afraid of the day when foreign is home to me and home is foreign.

I forgot how easy and great my life was.......

Some of you may remember this from back in the spring. It still chokes me up when I see it. Regardless of thought on the 'issue' please remember those in harms way and their families.

Bits and Pieces

I'm using my passport for the first time since 2000. Let's just say, I look a little different. So different that people have to stifle a laugh when they see it so as to not make me feel embarrassed. No matter, I am. But I'm also not. That's who I was, the girl with the bangs and unruly eyebrows. Yeah, it's all been brought up to speed but eh, at that time in my life all I cared about were what mattered. Funny enough that then I had more manners. Odd I know. But it's true. I lived and worked with my family then and cared about what others thought about me on the inside. Now I tend to care more about first appearance more than first impression. My manners have not be totally shot, but let's just say, there are times when I look back and thought, "crap did I really say/do that?". I'm slowly changing that again (without going back to the bangs and fiasco brows). Now I listen more. Now I think through my actions more. Though, these are baby steps. Keep that in mind.

Realization

I'm in sales. Sacry right? Right. It's really just hit me that I've moved from my world of sales/marketing to strict sales. And to top it all off, it's international sales. Yes, I have a few domestics that I'm working on but I was hired primarly to handle the export market. With this realization it just makes it more apparent that my level of responsibility is risen by 300% from my last job. It's cool. But by gosh, I'm happy that I've already started to dye my hair because I'm sure the grey will start creeping in soon. So as a salute (or cheers) to the start of my third week on the new job and soon departure for Egypt (Thursday) I am going to make a list of *eek* that I need to know before I jump on the red-eye come Thursday.......

- All of the special blends AADPI does (fyi, we're not normal....we specialize)
- Domestic sale prices for me to buy to turn around and compare after tariff, CIF, mixing & VAT is added on to compare to the int'l price
- Automatic converting of domestic (in lbs) to MT (1 MT = 2204.6 lbs)
- Specs for 25 different products (specs are the breakdown of the product - i.e. % protein, fat....humidity level....storage....etc)
- World market for product movement
- CIF rates to 5 differnt ports in the Middle East
- 25 INCOTERMS (Int'l Commerical Terms) - I bought a book to read
- H.S. codes for specialized products (silly port authorities actually care!)

AND

- I'm learning some Arabic too. Well, I can say, "Hello, I am ....." in Arabic at least. Anything to impress them and make a sale.

***PHEW***

M.I.A.

I absolutely despise the 'song' Boyz by M.I.A.

The Current over plays the damn thing. It drives me nuts. It's not even that great of a beat. It's more like an annoying mosqito that's stuck in your ear. Lovely...no? And just because they played that song today, of all days, I will NOT be donating to MPR for their big 50K drive. (well....at least not until I'm perky again and have recieved a pay-check.)

Speaking of paychecks. I want one. I went from a 2 checks/month to 1. And word to the wise. Never quit your old job and then start a new one (that requires you to move - moving = a lot of $$), unless you have dollar for dollar planned out. I'm living on scraps at the moment. Luckily, my first check will be decent so I won't be in poverty forever. It's just that these last 3 wks have been rotten expensive between car payments, a security deposit, new fees for moving, renting to move stuff, 'celebrating the move' (I kept that to a min.) and then the whole new 'wardrobe'.

And yes, the wardrobe upgrade was necessary. I absolutely cannot be traveling and meeting new clients in the drabby/small wardrobe I had during my last few years of at home contracting and being an assistant. Nope. I needed a major 'chic' upgrade. That required a massive trip to the King of Prussia mall where I spent two, too many hours in 3 stores. If you know me, I love stuff, but I hate shopping. I'm a snobby shopper to add to that. If I don't get the kind of service I expect (it varies from store to store) I will walk out and not come back for many weeks. I understand the whole commission thing people. You don't deserve it unless your customer is happy.

Get with the program you commission high associates! That note goes out to the sales associates at the following: Vickie's Secret, Balbinos and Nordstroms.

Oh and by the way....I found out that my boss wants to hire me an assistant. Don't worry, I won't get one till I actually start moving a crapload of product. And looking at wk no. 2....it's gonna be a few months. Oy.

Big Fear

I swear one of the biggest fears you can have as a female is when you walk into a restroom stall and see the toilet seat up. The immediate thought you have is, "Oh, crap, I walked into the Men's bathroom!" It happened to me today. I almost walked right back out to check the sign on the door, but I risked it (nature was callin!). Luckily it was the female bathroom and I was fine. But seriously, that is the cleaning people's way of messin with you!

(And if you're wondering why it's a big fear? Sorry, but that's a whole other story from days gone by.)

***************

On a lighter note:

Here's some things, comments and/or moments I've had since my move to PA......

- Our UPS man will have HUGE dip in his mouth but is still able to smile all pretty at me (do they teach that somewhere?)
- New Boss:*looking at Goldy Gopher on my desk* "That a badger .....? Michigan?" *and he was serious*
- "You talk with a south/northern drawl" (translates to "You talk weird")
- In PA they give you 20 days to registar your car and 60 days to get a license. BUT you must have a license in order to registar your car. To top that all off, you need to have two forms of new residency (i.e. tax statement, utility bills....)to show the Drivers License Center in order to get your new license. Please correct me if I'm wrong, but in order to get a utility bill you need to make it through a billing cycle which is typically 30+ days from when you move-in. It doesn't add up correctly. You do the math.
- The place to be in the morning is the Wawa or Dunkin' Donuts
- PA people DRIVE EVERYWHERE (I forgot what that's like.....I guess walking to the bank 3 miles away is kinda ridiculous!)
- I'm in Eagles territory. I shall have no other team. (No, I have not drank the kool-aid, yet)
- Werder (I like to call it 'water')
- I am in love with PCR (local tv) shows about PA companies. My roommate....not as thrilled.
- Every day I realize how much I don't know about this part of the U.S.

Here I Am

I've moved.

I'm stressed.

I'm going to Cairo to sell products I don't know anything about in two weeks.

And my boss now wants me to go to S. Korea.

What have I gotten myself into?!

Oy.

I'm HERE!!! (or there....or everywhere)

Well...I've made it through TWO full days at my new job. With that I give you the rundown of my last 36 hours:

Monday morning:

8:15 am - 45 min commute to work (in at 9 am)
9:30 am - Go over the products I'll be selling (ahem, exporting)
10:30 am - Introduced to the desk (table) that held my computer (e-mail NOT working), phone (can't RECIEVE calls) and printer (not hooked-up)
11:00 am - Sign a contract
11:05 am - Told I need a passport (DONE!)
11:06 am - Told I need to find a lead overseas
11:07 am - Searching for prospects to visit overseas

LUNCH (OY!)

2:00 pm - Still nothing functioning at my desk but I did manage to find something in Cairo. 5 mins later....approved to go to Cairo, Egypt in less than 3 wks

2:30 - ? Spent rest of day working on Cairo
6:20 pm - Leave work exhausted

Tuesday morning:
Walk-in "Hey....today you are booking Cairo."
11:30 am - I booked Cairo
12:30 pm - Visa photos taken
1: 30 pm - Printer & E-mail finally functioning
2:30 pm - New Blackberry (a.k.a CRACKberry)
3:30 pm - Answered three trade leads
4:30 pm - Yelling at my printer
4:45 pm - I have a backache
5:00 pm - Thinking that "Oh goodness....I have TOO much to do!"
Now: Going home

Kidnapper Van

I drove a kidnapper van. You know, one of those big white ones that just seemed to be used for all 'hiests'? My roommate convinced me of renting one to move my limited amount of stuff to my new home in Manayunk. It was great and sadly, my entire life that I built-up over a year and a half could all fit in one trip.

I have yet to officially move into my new digs but just hanging out there for a short amount of time was just like deja vu. I'm living in a smaller verision of a place like I had in St. Paul. Though I only have one roommate - she is SO much like the one I was closest to on Saratoga. It frigthen's me that even our neighbors are alot like my old neighbors. We have the older couple on one side and a younger family on the other.

The one major difference is that there is a local park across the street. But I found it quite convienent seeing that in my young neighborhood there are always league games going on (a.k.a prime time for me to watch from the comfort of my front porch).

Well....I must finish up my final week in the Commonwealth and prepare for the City of Brotherly Love (that is just so STRANGE.....).

Headache.

Some idiot of the past decided to send this to me with the "It's like looking into your future." Yes, this idiot is someone I actually know, but long story short his favorite joke towards me is saying I'll grow old to be some crazy cat-lady. hahahhaa. yep. I don't own a cat now and I have no intentions to (they leave hair everywhere - I'm too clean for that crap).

Anyhow it was crazy. You must see it. Laugh. Cry. Gag. I did them all. Well, not really. But seriously it's messed up.

Ice, Ice Baby!

I am sitting in spot no. 4 at my soon to be 'ex' job in 2 weeks. Seriously....I'm sitting at a desk amongst 30 boxes of stuff. I am feeling a tad claustrophobic. To stay sane I listen to music with headphones on and lose myself in the music and rhythm of work.

I forgot how much I hate the last few days of a job....that is because you have a bipolar outlook on your job. You can A) say screw it and half ass it seeing you are busy trying to get normal stuff done (i.e. find a place to live) or B) work extra hours to cover EVERYTHING you've been putting off for a 'rainy day' that never came and fret over the personal stuff that you will never get done.

I'm doing B more than anything right now. But I'm afriad that will mean I need to start collecting extra 'packing' boxes to convert them into a nice little hut to live in when I do move.

This fretting has made me extremely obnoxious at moments but thank the Lord I have three of the most awesome friends out here (yes roomie - you're included!) and two people from back home who will take a call at any moment to settle my nerves. Somedays I feel like I have them working overtime. Then I (annoyingly) start to apologize like I would back in the day (note: I used to say sorry for everything and actually meant it....sad, but so true). Next thing you know I realize how much more obnoxious that's becoming so I apologize AGAIN! And that is when you're suppose to just slap me cause I'm going crazy.

So yeah, I'm a crazy woman right now. I need to move soon but have no place to live and I am very, very sick of people asking about everything. Sush...I know what you are thinking and I don't care if that is considered mean...when you're stressed about moving (i.e. where to live in a new place where you know NO ONE, changing all your information over, car repairs...etc..) and how to finance it on a very SMALL budget because your car decided to die right beforehand giving you no option but to buy a new one.....heads will fly. (right there I deserve an award for the longest run-on sentence.)

Anyhow between my personal moving and having to pack and unpack my office at work (4x, but who's counting?!) I have officially lost 'it'. So you may wonder - "How are you handling this?" I wish I could say that I merely pick up the phone and solve all issues in a few words in a nice cool and calm fashion. But no, I'm taking a much more passive route that involves me sitting numbly infront of the tube, having a soda and playing spider solitaire.

As bad as that sounds I would like to say that it's the best way to get visitors (so lazy I am!) and well....I did discover the awesome mini-series "The War" on public television.

And now you may be thinking - "Why did I just waste 5 minutes of my life reading this?!"

I did see Vanilla Ice on Saturday night. I got to skip the line into the host bar because I am THAT tight with him! Or it could have been because my friends girlfriends sister had danced on the bar of this place and they gave her a free pass.....

Oh and I almost got kicked out that night too. Not because I was loud and obnoxious, ironically because I looked sleepy. But I told the 'dish boy' who had the nerve to kick me out to go back to his own business and that "like hell I'm leaving!" He left me alone after that.

I'm bad.....almost Vanilla Ice bad!

Waiting.....waiting....waiting.....

Tomorrow I will be making my third voyague to Philly. Fun. Okay, not really. Between the hours of traffic I need to deal with getting out of DC and then the road work being done in Baltimore topped off with the $20 of tolls....I'm tired of it. But I must go or else I will be homeless in a few weeks. And that is good for no one! It was so easy finding a place to live in DC (wiht a roommate) while never visiting once. Now that I'm closer I want to visit and can't seem to find a darn thing. Odd.

BUT I have picked the community. Manayunk (man-e-unk)is this cute little place that reminds me a very much older version of Grand Ave in St. Paul. Well, okay, just the main street does cause everything else is rowhouses and they are under much rennovation. I'm excited though. The last time I was there I checked out some of the local restuarants, found the gym, an ELCA church and ate at the local diner (where they serve ONLY Pepsi products!). It's a solid 20 miles from where I'm going to work, so yay, I'll be back to the commuting world. But I figured I would do that for my sanity seeing that living in Manayunk with other young professionals and having access to an 18 minute train ride into Center City.

Another reason why I love this little town....? Well you know how we shorten Minneapolis to Mpls? Yeah, Manayunk is MYK for short. Loves it! I couldn't do that with Arlington. When I got lazy I just said DC even though I live and work in Arlington. Go MYK - major points!

I'll Treat Myself Thank You Very Much!

The parking garage where I work is too nice. As in, they thank their tenants by giving them treats sporadically throughout the year along with a free DVD rental opportunities. Today....drivers recieved packets of Peanut M&M's......yummy!

I'm terribly jealous and deep down, confused.

Why?

Let's see.....

I walk to work equaling the following: polluting less (therefore helping the environment), wasting less oil and promoting a healthier lifestyle (making the health insurance industry happy).

But I have yet to be treated for my economcial, envrionmentally fit way of commuting to work.

I guess I'll have to wait for Blue Cross/Blue Shield or some environmetal group to reward me. Until then, I'm satisfied by knowing I'm doing my part in making this a little bit better place to live.

(okay I know that was a MAJOR 'pat on the back' to myself....but hey, it's been a rough few days, I need to do whatever I can to keep the spirits high)

7:45 a.m.

Every morning while working out I see the same man walk by our windows for a smoke. Just seems weird. Here I am working out to try to stay (get, become...whichever you feel is most suitable) to be healthy and there's the smoker who just as religously as I has his morning smoke.

I think if I was the one smoking I sure as hell wouldn't be doing it infront of the gym windows. Wouldn't you feel a little odd?

Case of the ......?

I'm sick. Not deathly sick but enough to make me want to check out for the day (or next few). My forehead is warm, my stomach queasy and my eyes bloodshot. Oh so fun. I'd stay home but I can still function and move; albeit not at my normal, fast pace.

I am also fighting it because I think it was totally brought on by me....and a little thing we call stress.

Why stress you make ask? Well, here's the deal. I have a new job. I start the 15th (Oct) but I'm missing to very vital things - a new place to live and a runnig vehicle. That's right. My faithful car of many, many years decided to bite the dust. I don't blame her. She did okay for the times we've been through (not to mention all of those snowstorms during my days in IA & MN). So in less than one month I need to buy a new car and find a place to live.

It would be a little simpler if I was made of money and knew exactly where I should live (considering safety and trusting landlord). But I have neither. So the pressure from the clock is starting to get to me and provide me enough stress to make me sick. Yay! (please note - that was very sarcastic).

I did ask for this. I chose to leave my family miles away and to test my independence. And oh boy - I'm doing it. So I guess I need to just suck it up and deal.

But on a happy note - the DC Gophers Alum flag-football team did excellent this weekend. We beat both William and Mary & Yale. And I got the first touchdown of the season. Not too bad!

Survivor

At the end of every month my office throws EVERYTHING out of the two fridges. We're talking Tupperware containers of food, frozen meals and such. They have no limits. I understand the deal because if it didn't happen, the stuff piles up. I get it. You leave it there...it gets thrown at exactly 5 p.m. on the last Friday of the month.

Unless it is pickled herring.

I bought a jar of pickled herring in a cream sauce back in the middle of August. I ate most of it but forgot about it. Not only did I forget about it then, I totally forgot I had brought it to work (for 2 meals!). That was until yesterday. I'm searching through the piles of bagged lunches, all the way to the back and what do I find? You guessed it. My pickled herring. Sitting there, tucked up against the back of the fridge on the top shelf.

So I'm wondering. What prompts you to toss things like peoples' nice Tupperware and unopened frozen meals but leave the half eaten herring? Are you scared of it? I mean, it's kinda grey and murky looking - but it tastes "Oh so delish!" This thoroughly amuses me.

I'm proud that I finally found something that can survive the garbage Nazi. I think this time I'm going to test her limits with luetifisk. If it works, I'm I have finally discovered the proper 'weapons' for the Scandinavians to use.

Maybe I should now keep a jar of herring in my purse instead of the mace. You never know when it will come in handy.


****

By the way - it's tough finding decent pickled herring out here. I miss my Olsen Fish Co. - I knew their products and quality. It was amazing. Oh well.

I'll Find My Own Meatloaf.

GK is doing a community thing in St. Paul where they are serving a meatloaf meal ($5) and having a street dance. I will admit. I'm a bit jealous. First of all, I make a one mean "Chuck Wagon Cheese Meatloaf" (from an old MN 4-H cookbook) and secondly, it's APHC. I love that show. Oh well. I'm over it. I'll just do my own version of being Minnesotan out here. I think I'll make a meatloaf and have a side of hotdish. I'll start with pickled herring as an appetizer and do a jell-o mold for dessert. It'll be delish. We can then end the evening with some coffee (Folgers...fancy stuff is not our style) and watch a home Twins game. Yah. Dat der sounds purty dern good.

There is another thing I'm jealous of back home at the moment. I read that it dropped to about 30 degrees F in places such as Benson and Willmar. Excuse me?! As I have had to sit in a muggy 88 degree weather with humidity at 91%. Not fair. Just looking at something would make me sweat. But for the first time in what seems like ages, I woke up to a beautiful morning with 65 degree weather and a low dewpoint. I can't see my breath yet (that means the weather is perfect for me) but it's coming. Slowly but surely. And today has been so beautiful. The sun coming up over the Iwo Jima and the air is starting to smell like the fall. Amazing. Gorgeous.

I can't wait to when I can stop giving a soulful look at my piles of sweaters and sweatshirts and actually wear one. Long gone are the days of me trying to figure out what is the most breathable/comfortable outfit I can wear in public without creating a henious display of poor fashion. Really, I've had to be creative without looking totally ridiculous (i.e. street hooker).

Moving on....

My search for an apt is still going on. I can't believe how much cheaper things are up in Philly. I may actually make enough to save enough. Hard to fathom at the moment, but we'll see.

I must get back to work. Sadly, I like what I'm doing today. I am editing a 26 page report on whey as an egg replacer. It's crazy, interesting and I'm a little too into it.

i.e.

While eating lunch the other day I was reading the Prepared Foods magazine I came upon at add for eggs. I sighed and thought aloud "well eggs....I like you but now you just have so much more to prove to me." A co-worker looked at me as if I just turned green. Me, all defensive, said, "Well you see, you can easily replace eggs in a bakery recipe with whey protein." I went further on to explain the benefits and simplicity of the change. Let's just say, they understand now, but still think I'm weird.

Great.

I'm With Fred.

I'm moving. Yay. I think I've been shouting this for ummm...at least the last 48 hours. Sorry to all who have to put up with it. I'm fricken excited, to say the least.

Though reality is hitting me hard right now. There's just a few minor details such as finding a place to live, getting out of my current lease, saying goodbye to friends, packing (which I despise), learning a new trade, finishing current projects at current job and so on. I can handle it though. I always have worked better under pressure.

On another note, last night I attended a house 'party' for Fred Thompson. It was a good time and by the end of the night my roommate got to witness me walking into our apartment holding a vase of flowers, a ballon, a rally sign and bumper sticker topped off with three buttons and a name tag saying "Hello, I'm.....AWESOME". Basically it looked as if I rolled around on the paraphernalia table and picked up everything. Funny enough, I managed to get home using public transportation (the metro) and no one looked at me weird or with a disapproving eye. I take that as a good sign.

Yes, if you're wondering this Repub girl is pretty much stuck (and have been for several months now) on Fred. I find him to be a pretty straight forward guy who markets himself as ... well.... himself. Right now, that makes me happy. And yes, I read that he had issues with seeing the Butterheads at the MN State Fair. I'm okay with that. It is odd. Unique - but odd nonetheless.

So go Fred. I hope you do well on the trail!

I am the food industry.

Not to brag...but it's true. In what I deal with, I get to be involved with the entire food industry. Even with some creative markets...err..marketeers.

For example - Bass Pro Shop's gravy. It has whey in it. Whey is what I sell; therefore I am a part of the gravy AND Bass Pro Shop worlds. Exciting, no?!



Next is confectionary. I love it. Really....I work in dairy and most confectionary uses some form of dairy products. Even the really sweet ones (e.g. truffles).



Oh and didn't you know? I dabble in the dog food industry. Sadly, it's a very lucrative business.


And finally, one of my favorite industry's to be involved in - SNACKS!



In all reality, dairy is involved in more than that (e.g. processed meat, sports nutrition, clinical nutrition, etc); I'm just showing off some of my crazy/favorite ones.

Soon I'll be moving on to more than marketing the products. I will be doing full-flegged selling of a specific product to those markets and people. What out, cause whey is coming your way, courtesy of me.

My Life - Chapter Four

I guess Chapter Four of my life will be starting soon. I don't know if people think it's normal to say it like that but for some reason that's the only way I can deal with the past and present. I may be a tad odd for the fact that I've always loved where I am but yet think/believe there are greener pastures on the other side. Yet, when I get to that other side I miss the other. There are moments when I miss them and then other times when they seem like ages ago and you no longer fit that.

Ages 1-20 of my life (i.e. Chapter One) was pretty stream-lined with the same thoughts, problems, values and desires...as little safety net of my life. But then it changed dramatically when I brought a group of people and activities into my life. Chapter Two only lasted for a few years...the majority of my college years. It was a good blur of fun, academics and learning a lot about who I really was. Next was Chapter Three.

The life I'm currently living.

It's very different from Chapter One. When I look back One, it seems so foreign. I barely remember it. I know there were a lot of great times but plenty of ones that just made me itch for change. Chapter Three is very much a fantasy. I live in a bubble world. Reality is far from the norm. My life is surrounded by people and things are 'important', materialistic and 'idealistic'. Not saying these are bad people but more like your super people. Ones that are not your norm old joys you'll meet on the street. So many of them are wonderful and so special to me, I couldn't imagine life without them.

I guess I would say 80% of the times I love my currently setting but I know it won't last forever. It's that 20%, which has been nagging me so much that I've started looking for new jobs in other locations.

So here it is. Looks like I will be starting a Chapter Four quite soon. I have been offered a job....a great job with great opportunities to grow and expand my horizons. As excited as I am, I find myself just as nervous. First of all it's in Philly. A large (VERY LARGE) city that I know little about (basically anything to do with Rocky and that's about it). Secondly, the job is different. As in, I'll be working in the for-profit work...the private industry. I will have commission. My new five most said words will include: clients, sales, pricing, quota and commission.

So yes, I will be doing it again. Ending my current job, packing, moving, unpacking, awkards meetings, making new friends and establishing a sense of community again in yet another new place.

Within Earshot

Everything I say and do is within earshot these days. My cube is located in the middle of the place (kitty corner to the Presidents office) and my apartment is snuggled in the middle of our condo complex. It's fine, these close quarters, but it sure makes it hard to enjoy free conversations (or I should say, interviews), loud television (my hearing sucks) and the like.

I didn't realize how much I adapted to this style of living until a visit back to the "Paririe" land. At the lake my parents are close to all of their neighbors. Little is left for privacy. When you sit on the porch everyone and their mother sees you and hears your conversations. I, being use to it, found it fine. But others were throughly annoyed seeing it was a fullhouse at the campsite one night.

It's just one of the things I have adapted to/ and changed. A few other things that I'm no longer use to include:

1) Figuring out personal transportation (I soley rely on cabs and metro these days)
2) Free parking
3) Not having a dry cleaner/shoe repair place on the corner
4) Nice flow of traffic
5) Clean and tidy grocery stores
6) English speaking people wherever I go
7) Friendly waves when traveling down a gravel road
8) People who don't know what is happening with global markets (it's my life...sorry!)
9) Worrying about the lawn
10)A great mix of radio stations


These things no longer are a part of my life. I miss some of them (e.g. nice grocery stores and service) but have found that there are other things that I would miss if I left. Not ready for that.

It was a good time home. I saw a billion relatives, the MSF, Picasso, Hjemkost, a wedding of two friends and played with my nieces at the lake....not too shabby, not too shabby at all.

Twinkies finally awaken.

Oh yay! The Twins actually decided that winning would be a good idea!

I had placed a bet not to long ago that the Twins would take the Wild Card and beat the Mariners in games won.


Glad we stopped talking - or else I'd be on the owing end - and I'm not a good loser.

I don't

"I don't cuddle. Unless he's big and buff. Then I'll think about it."
- Me

This has already been a long week and we're only sitting at Tuesday. A thought to be relaxing weekend turned busy and then a non-stop Monday only added on to the hectic lifestyle.

So this is the funny thing in my life right now....on average I send off my resume once a week to a job opening. Those weeks go by and I hear nothing. All of a sudden I get a phone call at work from a certain company I met (and who are members of my current place) offering me a job - in international sales. We're talking a nice promotion from where I'm at right now and room to grow. Now the kicker - I didnt' apply for a job, they've never seen my resume - all they did was met me and had dinner with me and 30 other people from around the world (there's more to it, but it's highly unnecessary to write about). From a 10 minute intense conversation about my background and industry to ONE drink with a small group where one person decided it would be great to mock me, I was offered an opportunity that should not be passed.

I was stunned. I didn't know what to say and what I did want to say I was unable to due to the fact I was in ear-shot of the President (current employer). So I mumbled that I could come and visit their facilities and discuss the job in further detail.

It's odd. My resume with detailed background and name-dropping references got me nothing. A 10 minute conversation about what I'm passionate about got me a potential job. Now, they made find that I'm not qualified for it or I may not desire the move or the package, but the fact is...I'm not that dumb. Well, at least as dumb as I was feeling at the time. Job searching is a real strain on one's ego and I was feeling it.

The best part of this is the main reason why I'm looking to move basically is due to me never leaving the office and meeting with people. So, the first time I leave the office for meetings/seminars I go and do this. Just goes to show that the best and only way to market oneself is by actually being there. Resumes can wow for only a moment - a good meeting can leave a statement.

As for what I'm going to do....we'll see. I will definately check it out and put all issues out on the table (moving, location, pay, future, etc....). I just pray they like me and want to extend the full offer. Then I pray that I make the right decision!

Jitters 89.3

For the longest time I hated 89.3, even though I donated money to MPR. I know, that makes no sense, but I felt they needed help and I support all things MN. Now I'm addicted and I'm making other people addicted. I forgot about the nice variation of old classics, new artists and local ones. One problem, it keeps me out of my circle of friends loop out east. If there are local [band] fans out here, we don't go for the same artists. Other than that group (which is literally 4 people) everyone else is mainstream America for music. That's fine.....just means no concert buddies.

But I shouldn't say bad things about mainstream. I respect that they can tap the consumer market so easily. Also, some are actually good. For example (old example) Fleetwood Mac. I never realized how many songs I love of theirs. I just downloaded a billion of them onto my Ipod and have been rockin' with them during my walks to work.

I even got a bar in Chicago groovin to them the other week. Go me.

Can't Sleep

There are only a few moments that I'll never forget in my life where I can say, "I was there when I heard/found out about this....." You know what I mean? One of those very surreal moments. The kind that even years later will still send a chill up your spine or give you goose bumps.

I had that today. I was sitting in a cab heading down Michigan Ave in Chicago with two Chinese and two Middle Eastern businessmen half-heartedly listening to the Chicago Public Radio Int'l News segment. As I'm tuning it out between thoughts of my 2006 trip to Chicago and hearing about the war I managed to hear in a very British tone: "A bridge in Minneapolis, MN collapsed today during rush hour."

My heart stopped. I strained to hear details but none were given. I turn around and noticed that I was the only one paying attention. Of course, seeing we're in a cab and the radio is barely audible....only would my fine tuned ears would pick-up the word, Minneapolis.

After two more blocks, which felt like hours, I threw money at the cabbie and ushered my guests into the steakhouse claiming that I needed to make a call outside. I frantically pick at my mothers cell number only to recieve disconnected dial tones. Finally I call home and reach my mother who says, "Hi honey, a bridge collapsed I'm on the phone with your grandma, Kelly is okay and so is Bryan. I'll talk to you later." LATER. LATER?! How could she?! I didn't know anything. The nerve! So here I am, at a fancy restaurant and needing to be professional when all I could do was sit there numb...nodding and smiling at lord knows what.

I had enough and whipped out my phone and started to text away. I knew I was being rude but I didn't care. I have friends and family to worry about. They are my life and even though they were at most 8 hours away from me (closer than normal) I felt like it was across the world. Finally my mother calls me back with more details only to leave me yearning to see a television. But I knew better than to leave my guests; really, what could I do?! Nothing. Except to pray...which I did.

I am happy to say that all I know are safe; though that leaves much room for sorrow towards many others. I pray for those families who are mourning and for those who have yet to mourn seeing not everything has been recovered.

So hours later, after a meal with my new friends (who did share their sorrow for the State of Minnesota),a brief conversation with my folks and a drink and shared stories with some DC and MN business people I am alone in my hotel room. A room that has now become my home (the maids know me by my first name and all of my drawers are filled with clothes) and I find myself staring at the images on CNN and feeling homesick. What I would give to be there with my fellow MN friends and family. Instead I am sitting quietly and watcing the same story and images over and over. I could very well turn it off but I can only do that with the TV....I can't in my head.

This is a tragedy for MN. A state thta is very tight and everyone is your neighbor. It's a state that believes in helping people, standing strong and has much pride in its roots. Even though it was "natural" (i.e. not terrorists) it still is a loss and stings. This very bridge I have driven on a million times over, a structure we felt safe to cross everyday no longer exists...leaving a main artery closed. It hurts.

With that, I bid you a good night MN.....I hope daylight brings a better picture.

Updates....cause I'm THAT exciting

2:59 pm - I've already gone through a billion reems of paper. Don't worry, I'll go and plant a tree tomorrow.

Going Crazy - in a Good Way

Okay that probably makes no sense but it's true. I've had a heck of a past few workdays full of deadlines, proofs, drafts, pulling out of projects and the list goes on. It has been pretty darn stressful with some long hours and a ton of small meetings. Funny thing is, I love it. I have more of a routine this way. Seeing I don't have a normal 9-5 schedule right now I don't have to worry about filling up the open space with activities and people. I guess that's weird - or so I've been told. Oh well....

Now I'm off to the Windy City for awhile.

Happy Anniversary!

Today is (was) my parent's 32nd Anniversary. Sometimes it's hard to believe that two people can be in love AND like each other that long. I joke that I have commitment problems.....seriously....I can't even commit to a TV show beyond a few weeks. But I applaud them for all that they have accomplished together. An amazing couple nontheless.

As for me. I love and hate my age. It's a contradictary age. Everything is amazing yet it's not. For example this very scene: I'm sitting here, just finished hosting a nice little girls night complete with drinks, pedi's and a movie (not to mention I dressed the theme of the movie - Holly Golightly). But after all of the guests left I sat here feeling like nothing but a disappointment. I don't know if it's because I'm alone or because we expect more of ourselves. It stinks and I'm not a fan of it. But what do I do. I sit here and tear up to a few friend close and far.

So my friends......how are you? In your age what makes you smile? What makes you cry? More than anything....what makes you need a hug so bad it hurts? I'm curious....

Letters

Dear Rocky –

I look forward to the night of ½ price burgers at
Whitlows. Often times I cannot arrive until way past my regular dinner
time thus giving you a very hungry girl which is better known as a very grumpy
girl. With that I do not find it necessary for you to crack dumb jokes
when I try to order my usual (okay I’ve only had it 3 times in the past year)
but still when I way “may I have the Yoelddler” I expect you to simply go on and
ask me if I would like to substitute my fries for slaw or onion rings. I
don’t need the “Oh…we don’t have one here but there may be one down the
street.” With that kind of ass-musings I will start deducting from your
tip.

Please remember that for next time.

Sincerely,

Me

Don’t worry, I tipped him well. And I named him Rocky because he sounded just like Rocky Balboa…though, sadly, he didn’t look like him.

******

Dear Gym Goers at Colonial Place,

I like all of you, really I
do. But you’re annoying the hell out of me lately. Between the
bajillion Dixie cups left half-full of water on the counter and the lack of
sanitizing the machines before you leave them I’m in pure disgust. YOU may
be okay with sharing sweat with someone else but I’m not. Not to be a
jerk, but when I see you sweating all over something and then just up and leave
(with perspiration still dripping from the handle bars of the elliptical
machine) I want to vomit.

I know I can just clean them off
before I do my thing, but that’s not the point. I wouldn’t want someone to
have to slip and slide over all of my germs and sweat. It’s not
nice. I might as well come and wring my sweat towel/rag (yes, I sweat big
time and it’s gross….ack!) over you if you like to share your sweat with the
rest of the gym.

And to the guys who literally check themselves out
in the mirror 99% of the time they are doing their 20 lb (ha!) reps. Yeah,
I’m the youngest gal there. I’m sure Joan and Margie aren’t interested in
your lack of bulging biceps. And to Norma….please, for heaven’s sake, stop
moaning when you ride the stationary bicycle. A) You aren’t even doing a
tough level (I’ve looked) and B) It sounds like you’re ….. ummmm… doing the
deed! Yuck! You grossed me out so much the first time that I had to
cut my workout short!

Best,

Not-a-fan of Sweat

So I’m back to doing my daily, twice a day workouts. People think I’m nuts but in all reality it’s because I’m lazy. Yeah, I know, that doesn’t make sense. But I am very lazy as in – I’m a horrible dieter. It’s summertime people….that means grilling out. I NEED to workout after devouring endless hamburgers, hotdogs, steak, marinated chicken and shrimp every weekend. Secondly, I sweat when I walk to work. I figured I didn’t want to ruin my work clothes so I’d just wear workout clothes to work and then change there. Well…since I’m already in them, might as well workout. And finally, I workout after work too is due to the fact my morning session is too short (hey, I want to watch Coach at 6 am) for it to be worthwhile so I need to extend it to the later part of the day. Thus, I workout twice a day cause I’m lazy.

Anyway, back to what I was attempting to say…..now that I’m back from my week-long hiatus from the gym people have been getting on my nerves for their lack of courtesy. May I point out that we don’t pay for the use of this gym? It’s part of our campus so it’s free for all who work on our campus. I don’t think it would hurt for people to at least attempt to keep it clean AND as germ free as possible. Germs already are very abundant at gyms…why help add to it?

So, I’m thinking of strapping on a can of Lysol and following around some people. Maybe they’ll get the hint next time.

Say "Adeiu to the Big Dawg" (a bit late....sorry!)

My mother loves brats. When I was little I thought she was weird for that....who would want this big hunk of spicy meat when you could have a nice, simple hotdog loaded with ketchup...and oy...add a slice of cheese and you're in Heaven! But as I grew older that only left me with a little of something to be desired. My palate had changed and so I entered the 'old folk' arena by switching to the brat. Needless to say, I love me a good one. I actually find myself becoming very picky when it comes to those things. I may nay it after a bite or two due to it's over zealous spice or lack-there-of. Who knew I'd be a conisseur of the brat?! (okay, I'm not but damn they are good!)

So yes, I will be missing Mr. Ralph F. Stayer....the Einstein of the Johnsonville brand for processed meats. He was the man behind the 'supa-dawg'.....all that spiced meat along with the thick coated casein (I appreciate this even more after working with dairy applications in process meat). I think I just drew a little tear again (ahem...I may or may not have done so when I found out the other day...sush, it's food we're talking about - a.k.a SERIOUS business to me!).

I'm sure Sheboygan Falls, WI and Ely, MN (his birthplace) will be mouring a great man with a good sense of taste and in the end - business.

In the burger I trust..

30 friends - check
8 coolers of beverages and food - check
several pairs of aqua socks - check
2 mile jaunt down the James river - PRICELESS!

Okay, they may of may not have been all of my friends at the beginning of the journey but by the end they sure were.....nothing like a little 5 hour process (we stopped on a beach 1/2 way down) to make a few friends and enjoy one of the most beautiful and sunny days that the C-ville area can provide.

I also got to experience Richmond, VA for the first time in my life. A few bars and a house party later I had throughly enjoyed the night. And perhaps it wasn't too bad to be waited on by my surrogate family down on the South Side. Love you mom and dad VA!

Only shitty thing....waiting for the train back to DC - thank you for being 1 hour late! Jerks.

Trust

Is it bad that right now out of all the people I know...I can only trust/depend on 10 of them? TEN! So sad.

***

My Final Thoughts for the Week:

I am a tad sad that Bonds won't be a part of the All-Star game...but eh, life goes on.

We need more Wednesday's off.

I am building my very own website...with a special domain name and all! It's to do about the food industry for 20-somethings. I can't wait for the launch date (date TBD).

I'm still counting on the Twins to do better than the Mariners...have a an end of the season bet and I MUST win.

The news is so boring right now that the only thing consistent online, radio and paper are the high temps (no crap...it's only July and all!) and Scooter Libby being released (so, so sad!).

I am already exhausted from the 12 Days.....and it's only Day 5! uffda.

Rocky is my HERO

First of all......HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA!!!! And to all people celebrating freedom...remember it's because of these people (picture)

Second of all..... I'm a terrible host, I know. Sorry friends but my bed looked SO comfortable at 10:30 pm.

Third of all......Tourists are going to kill me today.

Fourth of all.....it happened. The one thing I thought wouldn't and/or couldn't did. But I'm excited and can't wait to see what develops.

Mother Nature go home

My thoughts right now:

A) I should not be at work
B) It's too damn nice out to be at work
C) My mom is visiting...hence I should not be at work
D) Today is the official start day of the "12 Days...." *cough* I should not be at work

But I'm at work. And yes, I hate deadlines.

And for those of you who witnessed a girl (amongst a group of golfers and tennis players) running around DC on Saturday....I apologize. I my have been a tad out of control. I was doing my part to win a race and help the inner city kids. I'm such a phlianthropist!

Quote of the Weekend:

"Remind me tomorrow that I helped someone today."
- DCSMASHED


And some summer photos........oh the life of kickball, birthday parties and the ULTIMATE party with MS!

Bowling in Chicago

I went bowling in Chicago yesterday.

Yes, you heard right. I woke-up at 5 am to catch a flight out of Dulles to O'Hare and then went bowling and ate some food from 10:30 am until 2pm. That's what my organization calls a company picnic.

I decided to spend a few extra hours in the city so I at least went downtown to mourn the loss of my beloved Marshall Fields and join the Chicago happy hour scene. It was a good time.

The the best part of the night was the following:

Txt from BS: "Hey, wanna hangout tonight?"
Me: "Sorry, I'm having dinner in Chicago right now"
BS: "and Paris tomorrow.....?"

I so should have said, "No, Italy, I'm hungry for pizza." But I didn't. Darn.

Take THAT FB!

I made it. A whole week without looking at The Facebook. I do have to say, rarely did I miss it. Only twice did I start to key in the URL and then realize what I was doing. I also have to admit, I didn't miss it much. Well, at least from what I saw when I did the little check-in today. I don't think I missed any birthdays (cross-my-fingers!) and well yeah, there were some pictures up from a b-day party I attended. All together - boring. So I guess I can live life soundly and happily without the thing. Though I have a feeilng a few friends might get upset over that (again, back to the whole communication thing).

As for right now in my life - I'm so busy I might die! Work has me over my head (ahem, I'm writing this AT work AT 9:12 p.m. on a Thursday...I just got done with my projects for the day). Also I feel like I'm totally out of what's going on. Happy hours are non-existant and about only 10 friends make it on the contstant list. Let's not even start in on family (who I'm sure think I'm actually dead). How can that be? Am I that bad at scheduling my life?

And final thought for the evening....

Whatever happened to going to a home game and having the majority of the crowd cheer for the home team? Last night it was the Nats vs. the Tigers. I do understand that the Tigers are good....but I didn't know that 3/4 of RFK would be filled with Tigers fans. I almost got beer thrown on me because I cheered for the Nats at one point. Seriously...only here would you get that.

I miss my Twins.

Out of Sight - Out of Mind

Funny Note:
A sissors is not your house keys.

I had just gotten done doing errands and I was tired and dirty with a mess of an aparment. When I got home at 9 p.m. I was right on schedule - do laundry, make the egg salad, restock the bathroom supplies, take out the 3 loads of garbage (we just bought and installed a new light fixtures) and vaccum (BIG TIME!!!). The eggs were ready to go, the laundry was in its basket and the garbage was piled high. I grabbed the laundry, picked up 3 small garbage bags and the the blue thing I thought was my keys on the table and headed out the door. "click!," went the door. "Crap!" went me. The door locked. And I was locked out. Also, let's not forget that my roomate had just left for a late dinner with a friend. So there I was stuck and didn't know what to do. So I threw my laundry in the wash and headed outside to dump the garbage. Luckily I had planned on running over to my neighbors later on to grab a ticket .... I just may have been a tad early (20 mins), all sweaty and gross (it was 80% humidity and in the low 80's....at NIGHT) and VERY GRUMPY. Luckily he was nice to me and let me in to cool off and wait for the roomie to get home.

So the moral to the story is.....never think the 'blue' thing is your keys. It could possibly be your sissors.

********

As for the title....I'm contemplating the whole "is it bad to just let go of some 'friendships'"? You see, it's been a big thing lately on both ends for me. I know why I do [let go] - so it only saddens me that I was that boring/bad/annoying of a 'friend' to others. Luckily I'm quite heartless right now, which makes everything that much easier (ha! that's a bit of a lie). So I guess the whole - "out of sight, out of mind" does play a key role in this. You might at well aslo say......."out of heart" too.

Challenge

Last night, while hanging out with two friends, we got onto the discussion about Facebook and how we are addicts. I find myself on there quite a bit but nowdays I spend less time looking at peoples profiles and more at using the ‘wall’ and ‘messages’ for another form of communication. As we were discussing it and one friend (who was currently logged into the site) was gasping at new found information I felt …. uncomfortable. Is our generation that lazy and removed from friendships that we now only use things like Facebook and MySpace to connect?

Not only has that happened but it also goes with cell phones and Blackberry’s (a.k.a crackberrys). I have so many friends who don’t use their cell phones to talk. Instead they communicate almost solely through text messaging. Now don’t get me wrong – I like the idea that you can send a quick text to someone when you are in a place that the reception is horrible or too loud for one to understand what you’re trying to say. But it’s those who use it to have complete conversations. Really….pick up the stupid phone and talk to the person; so much more can be accomplished in less time.

My favorite are the people, and trust me there are too many, who will be out to dinner with you and right in the middle of a conversation they are checking their Blackberry and sending off e-mails. Trust me. No friend of mine is THAT important that they HAVE to send an e-mail immediately. It’s downright rude.

After going through this little upsetting moment last night I declared that I would like to stop my Facebook account. Needless to say, both friends laughed and said it could never happen. And, at least for now, that is true. I do rely on it too often for information because I was not diligent enough to plan ahead or take the time to write down notes of birthdays, contact information and so on. But I am going to try something……

Starting today I’m going to go an entire week without Facebook.

I know there is no way to monitor this, seeing it doesn’t tell you the last time I logged in. But I will announce if I made it or broke my pledge.

And so…the countdown begins!

I may or may not be a ....

a Lutheran.

Last Sunday was the first day back sitting in the regular part of service because choir is done for the summer. It was kinda fun though during that time I got a tad bit distracted becuase I knew no one was watching me and I'll have to admit, my mind wandered. My entire life I've grown-up Lutheran (ELCA-Lutheran to be exact). I've adored it for a multitude of reasons such as I'm half Norwegian and half German (which makes up 90% of Lutherans), not to mention it's a base of Minnesota pride. For example, when I walked into my new church in VA and told them I came from MN I understood how celebrities felt. I was adored because I came from the Motherland of Lutheranhood! Beyond the jell-o molds and bake sales I grew to appreciate the denomination for what it stood for (I'm talking post-post-post Reformation!). I find it a pretty welcoming place and, in some places, is willing to take on very controversial social issues instead of ignoring them. I don't believe there is a RIGHT version of Christianity, I believe it is what you find the best way to communicate with the big dude upstairs. And therefore, at least for now, being a Lutheran suites me fine.

But the whole reason why I even brought this little pride factor up (I know, I'm being far from a "modest Lutheran"!) is that I recently read through one of those many lists out there that starts with "You might be a __________ if....." Sadly and humorously I laughed the entire way through.....perhaps because many of them hit home with me.

So here I am, going to share with you (only the ones that are true to me) why I might be a Lutheran if........


...you read your Catechism and start arguing theology with yourself because no one else is around.
...the most mail you receive all year is from the Stewardship Committee.
...you serve Jell-O as a vegetable.
...your biggest fund-raisers are bake sales instead of bingo.
...you can't have a meeting without having a meal.
...you refer to your trip to Minneapolis (or Chicago) as a pilgrimage.
...sharing the peace during the service takes more time than the sermon.
...all of your casserole dishes have your name on the bottom.
...you're willing to pay up to one dollar for a meal at church.
...you ask for "A Mighty Fortress" on the love song request line.
...you actually understand the folks from Lake Wobegon.
...you consume some form of Jell-O at every holiday meal.
...you don't question why the seat you sit in at church is called a pew.
...you have an uncontollable urge to sit in the back of any room.
...you think the communion wafers are too spicy.
...your mother reminds you often that she wishes you'd studied the organ.
...your mother could give any Jewish mother a run for the money in the guilt department.
...you think lime Jell-O with cottage cheese and pineapple is a gourmet salad.
...your congregation's first two operating rules are "Don't change" and "Don't spend."
...your LCMS pastor refers to St. Louis as "the holy city." (WELS=Milwaukee; ELCA=Chicago; ELS=Mankato; etc.)
...at Thanksgiving you serve lutefisk and try to convince your kids it's really a turkey.
...you're at an evangelistic rally and you actually manage to raise your hands waist high.
...the only mealtime prayer you know is "Come Lord Jesus."
...you and your family of six squeeze into the last pew along with the 140 members already sitting there.
...you can't get into heaven without a casserole.
...you notice the Kool Aid stock shot up during the Vacation Bible School season.
...you wonder why bread and wine are used for Communion instead of coffee and donuts.
...you are referred to as the frozen chosen!
...you consider lottery tickets a serious investment.
...you make your hotdishes with cream of mushroom soup and your salads with Jell-O.
...you sing "Stand Up, Stand Up for Jesus" while sitting down.
...a line item in the trustee's budget is "coffee maker maintenance."
...you think tuna hotdish is a gourmet meal.
...your idea of an affirmation is "This is most certainly true."
...you feel guilty about not feeling guilty.
...you think anyone who says "casserole" instead of "hotdish" is trying to be uppity (or maybe even Episcopalian!)
...you think the term "Jell-O salad" is redundant.
...you were little you actually thought the Reverend's first name was "Pastor."
...you think you're paying your pastor too much if he gets a new car for the first time in eight years.
...you hear something really funny and smile as loud as you can.
...it takes 10 minutes to say good-bye.
...doughnuts are in the official church budget.
...you're watching "Star Wars" in the theatre and when they say, "May the force be with you," the theatre replies, "and also with you."
...you doodle on the back of communion cards.
...you can say the meal prayer all in one breath.
...Bach is your favorite composer just because he was Lutheran, too.
...you hesitate to clap for the church choir or special music because "it just wasn't done that way in the old days."
... you think the four food groups are coffee, lefse, lutefisk, and Jell-O.
...you actually think the pastor's jokes are funny.
... you pronounce the word Lutheran "Lutern."
...requests you hear are preceeded or followed by the phrase, "If it's not too much trouble then..."
...you know all the words to the first verse of "Silent Night" in German but can't speak a word of it.
...someone asks you after church if there's any "decaf coffee" and you laugh because you KNOW that if it doesn't have caffeine, it can't be coffee!
...you hear something really funny and smile as loud as you can.
...it takes 10 minutes to say good-bye.
...you doodle on the back of communion cards.
...you can say the meal prayer all in one breath.
...Bach is your favorite composer just because he was Lutheran, too.
...you hesitate to clap for the church choir or special music because "it just wasn't done that way in the old days."
..you only serve Jell-O in the proper liturgical color for the season.
...you didn't know chow mein noodles were a Chinese food.
...when someone mentions red and green (in terms of Christmas), you immediately think of a battle over hymnals.
...during the entire service you hold your hymnal open but never look down at it.
...during communion you hum the hymns so you can see who's at church that Sunday.
...rather than introducing yourself to a visitor at church, you check their name out in the guestbook.
...you think Garrison Keillor's stories are totally factual.
...you have your wedding reception in the fellowship hall and feel guilty about not staying to help clean up.
...a midlife crisis means switching from the old hymnbook to the new one.
...the pastor skips the last hymn to make sure church lasts exactly 60 minutes.
...you don't make eye contact when passing someone in the hall because you think it's impolite.
...your choir believes volume is a fair substitute for tonality.
...you don't know what was sooo funny about dat movie "Fargo" then.
...in response to someone jumping up and shouting "Praise the Lord!", you politely remind him or her that we don't do that around here.
...you think a meeting isn't legitimate unless it's at least three hours long.
...peas in your tuna noodle hotdish add too much color.
...you make change in the offering plate for a ten.
...you think butter is a spice.
...you have more than three friends whose first names have the letter "j" as the second letter.
...the only open pew is up front, so you volunteer to shovel the sidewalk.
...Ole and Lena are really the names of your relatives.
...you know what a Lutheran Church Basement Woman is.
...you think hotdish is one of the major food groups.
...you think that an ELCA Lutheran bride and an LCMS groom make for a "mixed marriage."

Yep, I'm just a tad Lutheran!